Way back in early recovery I was struggling a lot with urges to drink and use. Even though I was going to meetings every day, reading my Big Book, and working the Steps there were still certain times where, for no apparent reason, I just felt overwhelmed by everything and wanted nothing more than to drink and get high. One day my sponsor suggested the following: go out in public and skip or hop down the street and then hop or skip all the way back. I was reluctant at first but, being a good sponsee, I decided I would follow suggestions and give it a try. Before I even got halfway down the street I felt so foolish and at the same time was having so much fun that I couldn't stop laughing. Amazingly enough, the urges to drink and use disappeared completely. That day my sponsor taught me a very valuable lesson--at any given point in the day I have the power to change my attitude and experience unconditional happiness. For this alcoholic, once given to severe mood swings and deep, dark brooding, that was a very powerful and exciting lesson. I learned that I truly was master of my own ship and was free to chart whatever course I pleased. It reminds me a lot of something Abraham Lincoln once said: "Most folks are about as happy as they make up their minds to be." In the end, then, I guess it's all about choice.
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