I just wanted to share a nightmare I had the other night. I don't know if it's a warning or just a normal process of getting sober. Anyway- I was dreaming that I'm sitting in someones house with a huge bottle of vodka just drinking it straight outta the bottle. I suddenly realize my friends are waiting for me at an AA meeting and I need to get going. But, I can't stand up. I can't mutter a single coherent word. Where the hell am I?! How did I get alcohol? Why am I drinking?! Everyone's waiting on me and I'm drunk as a skunk! How will I face my friends? The AA group, my family? Now I have to start all over again with a white chip and admit I drank and blew it! No...I just won't tell them. I'll put off telling them...I'll act like nothing happened and noone will ever know but me. That old sinking feeling of having to sneak around and lie to hide the truth. I'm so disappointed! I hate myself! Then I sat straight up in bed, dripping with a cold sweat. Was it true? Had I gone on a bender & blacked out? Where was I? Where had I been? Just then the realization set in- I was in my own room, in my own bed, no alcohol, no hangover, no coyote ugly date next to me-LOL! Thank you God & thank you AA.
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