Alcoholism Support Group
Alcoholism is the continued consumption of alcoholic beverages, even when it is negatively affecting your health, work, relationships and life. If you think alcohol is causing you to lose control, it's time to seek help. Our group is a safe place to vent, check in, get back up if you fall, and reach sobriety.
Early in recovery I heard a very intersting share at a local meeting I was attending. A man said: "If you don't know what you want, others will use you for what they want." It sounded so cynical at the time, but over the years I've come to see that that statement is profoundly--and sadly--true. There are indeed a lot of people out there who, if given the chance, will use and abuse those of us not so savvy to the game of life. That's why learning what a boundary is and learning how to set healthy boundaries has become such an important part of my recovery. It's what allows me to stay feeling safe and sane in a world where the takers sometimes seem to outnumber the givers. Had I not learned early on about boundaries I don't think there's any way I could've or would've managed to stay sober these past 13 years. I know I've hurt feelings along the way and have even lost friends and alienated family members, but the demands of sobriety really never left me any choice. Good recovery demands not only hard work and consistency but also that at times I'm willing to take risks, and for this alcoholic, who always loved winning approval and people-pleasing, setting boundaries turns out to be one of the biggest risks of all. But, loving sobriety as I do, that's a risk I'm always willing to take.
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theatre and I are there already. I'm having a very berry tea with crackers, cheese and cherry tomatoes and she's having a joint with some beer and we're both on really comfy recliners on thick pile carpet. we need some help with the decor if anyone is around??
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I'm trying to exercise daily. I was doing fairly well until I sprained my ankle 2 weeks ago but now I'm getting back on the horse. Today I walked over a mile with my arm weights that are about 22lbs total. I was out of shape and it was hard on my arms. I also did my 30 situps. I'm also going to drink a lot of water and try to eat healthy. I do tend to have a sweet tooth but I'm cutting...
My only concern is some people don't know the difference between boundaries and barriers (or walls). Boundaries are sort of like road blocks, we could move them around as our circimstances change. When I first came to AA I had a broken heart and some very tall, strong walls around me. A good friend brought that to my attention, right around the time I was realizing I was lonely (I would never have admitted that, not even to myself). As soon as I admitted that to God, myself and another human being (my therapist), the walls started to come down. Does any of this sound familiar?
I realized if I want to live I would have to stop drinking. If I want to stay sober I need to set bounderies, not only on who or what I let become part of this work in progress, but on myself.
One of these is, I don't like to be touched. I put up with it for a long time without saying anything, when I finally said rather tersely, "Don't touch me" to a huggy feely person I was rebuffed rather harshly. This person acted like I had denied them a right.
I finally shared about the physical, emotional and other abuses I suffered as a child and that I felt violated when people put their hands on me. Most people left me alone after that but at the end of the meeting this same woman tried to corner me outside to hug me. She triggered a PTSD episode and I almost got physical with her.
At this point in time my insides and outside don't match because the only way to keep some people off me is to act aloof.
Wouldn't it be simpler if we all practiced commen courtesy and respected each other's space?
Living by principles will alienate many people. However, that is good. The people that leave are not the people we need in our lives anyway!
"What has light to do with darkness"??
Guru