i did my 4th step as if my life depended on it- it did- but the promises were not part of my package. why? i don't know. i believed in what i was told and, just for me (my opinion), life was worse than before. i felt betrayed because i believed. i believed in all i was told and my life was worse. why? why did the promises never transpire after all the pain, the suffering, the hard work etc.? in fact, in sobriety,my life has not improved and i say this as honestly as i can because i wanted so to believe.did i work my steps thoroughly? you have no idea. none.i don't know what i am imparting but,my life did not get better, i just got a different set of problems insurmountable no matter how much i bled on the pages of the 4th step. i say this-without malice-but this is MY truth.love, devonh

hi George, I did my fourth step alone then showed my sponsor. After that we did it together. Fear and anger ruled my life that made me a lying self centered. Well lets just say it was easy to find my defects and wrong doings. Good topic though.

Hi George,

I had a hellish 4th Step the first time.
it took my breath away and I poured out every bit of HONESTY I had into those STEPS especially in cleaning house.
I never wanted to DRINK again. I was horribly ill from many diseases including alcoholism

I was told if I did a thourough job on the 12-Steps, I would never drink again and that you would have a TRANSFORMATION from GOD, a SPIRITUAL AWAKENING.

I depended on those steps like they were AIR to breath.

My fourth Step had almost 400 people on it. FOr me to even be able to remember all of what was brought up was amazing in and of itself.

With that I was given the PRomises starting at each transition and Step of Faith I had to take.

The biggest GIFT to me was after I had completed all the STEPS.

When I was sitting in the parking lot of a CHURCH and my SPONSOR and I did my 12th STEP sitting in the car. After completeing it I went home to reflect on what had happened. Just like on my 5th Step.

Miracles started to spring forth like the noonday sun.

I do hope that this helps

Tamar

Hey George... i can totally relate to your experience with the Help of Joe McQ and the results obtained thereof..
I did my fourth step(paperwork) in 1.5 hours the same night i felt like I was gonna drink or jump off my 10th floor balcony...I had done my 3rd step decision and prayer, with my sponsor on our kneees, that very week too..but.. as our BB says.. NEXT we launched out on a course of action.... Not waited until I felt better to do the steps !

I was also very fortunate to have attended a Joe n Charlie Big Book study weekend just before all this too. How much more help could God send this sick puke ? lol
I did my 5th step with my psychologist( also a 15 yr active AA member)..
WE also did my 6th 7th and 8th step at the same time.
When I got home, I reviewed my actions and sharing of my fifth step and thanked God from the bottom of my heart that i was thorough and that He had given me the strength to pick up the pen and paper instead of letting me go over the edge in to the abyss.

As for the results that I expected from my 5th step...
I did feel some relief in sharing... but i felt more like an actual participant in my own life and my own recovery than anything...
The promises did not materialize oright then and there and I was told NOT to expect them...
This confused me until my sponsor had me re-read the promises and helped me understand what it meant when it said " we will be amzed before we are half way through"
I thought that meant halway through the steps...
it actually means half wway through my amends IN THE NINTH STEP ! lol
And you know what,,, I did feel that way before I was half way through.. THE AMENDS..
Thanx for the great topic George.
botbotco

i wanted to add one more thing. i am not alone- the book says sometimes qickly, sometimes slowly insofar as the promises are concerned. guess, my luck (LOL) i was a very slowly person. but i know worse.my second sponser worked her steps and lost her only daughter to cancer, her husband to brain cancer and her only granddaughter (12 years old) to rape and murder- her first 90 days.! and she did not drink!.i am doing the steps over and i tell you what- i will do so with serenity in mind instead of those promises. kind of like buying a lottery ticket and getting pissed off when they call out someone elses numbers.all, truly, i said was that i had a desire to stop drinking but then....here comes the expectations. i was an idiot to drink after almost 2 years out of nothing but spite.that was a dilly of all mistakes. i could not see-right in front of me-the real miracle love,devonh