So today is 458 days.. Incredible.. Heres the thing, I have been not doing well, and normally alcohol is not on my mind, maybe for a moment, but it goes fast. It is on my mind constantly.. Just 1 drink, and why am I even sober, I wasn't a bad drunk, didn't hurt anyone(except myself), didn't drink and drive.. I am self talking that it is okay.. I am scared, because I was smokefree for 48 days, and broke that, due to all the stress, and it was better than drinking.. I have taken on alot of challenges. I need to get through this. I do not attend AA(Please don't say anything mean to about that).. Lady Jane is just reaching out, not for sympathy(no sympathy, PLEASE), but for some encouraging words..
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