Adoption Support Group

Adoption is the legal act of permanently placing a child with a parent or parents other than the birth parents. Whether you are looking to adopt, putting your child up for adoption, parenting an adopted child, or just thinking about it, this is the place to discuss.

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deleted_user 10/29/2007

I just wanted to share my story with someone. I have spent a few years looking on and off for my birth mother. By a stroke of luck someone saw my details online, did some research for me and gave me her address. I wrote to her, putting my email address on the letter and shortly afterwards I received an email from her. That was a week ago. I could never have anticipated what sort of reaction I would get but it has been amazing. I am so glad I found her, when we write it feels like we have known each other all our lives and are very much alike. I haven't yet told my adoptive family, I am just enjoying this special time but I have been feeling guilty as I really want to have some sort of relationship with my birth mother and this is what she wants too. I was the only child she ever had so it makes the situation even more uique. We email on a daily basis and have exchanged photos etc and she is thrilled to learn she has grand-children. I keep wondering if it is wrong to want her to be involved in my life but I am so thrilled that I have found her it seems the right thing to do. I now know how lucky I am, many people don't get this response from their birth parents and I feel truly blessed that I did. Thanks for listening.

jedoispartir 10/29/2007

I understand. These feelings are normal. It is almost ALWAYS right to know youre b-parents. Do not feel guilty about that.

deleted_user 10/29/2007

I know excatly how you're feeling. I found my bmom a little over a month ago. I wasnt expecting the feeling I had come rushing in. it was sort of shaky at first I guess we were feeling each other out. Now we are on the right track. We talk almost every day. It's a wonderful feeling. We, too, picked up like we had known each other forever. We are cultivating a relationship and we are both sooo excited about it. We tell each other that we love one another. even though we are still basically strangers....the love is there. We are supposed to meet pretty soon and I cant wait. Now, on the flip side..there have been some issues to come up, not specifically with me, but she is dealing with some stuff and I am trying to be as supportive as I can be...because that's what families do. My adoptive parents know, dad is ok with it..mom, not so much, but I needed to do this for me. I hope all continues to go well. And most of all enjoy these feelings, they have been a long time coming!

lav 10/30/2007

Gosh, how truly special!! To be able to have a relationship with your birth mom is priceless!!!!!! Don't feel guilty about it though. I have been looking for over 20 years now and think that I may have finally come to the end of that road. If the information that I have gotten is correct, and I feel deep inside that it is, then I am saddened at the same time. You see, she died in 2000. I will never have that opprotunity to meet her. She will never have the opprotunity to meet her grandchildren and greatgrandchildren by me. I will never be able to tell her how much I have loved her all my life.
Cherish the time you are able to spend with her. Let your adoptive parents also know how much they mean to you. Both parents can share your heart and love.
I'm so very happy for you!!!!!

deleted_user 10/30/2007

Thanks you so much for all you kind thoughts and advice. Although this is something I have wanted and dreamed about my whole life I don't thik you can ever be truly prepared for the moment when it does happen. I am so glad to know that what I am feeling is normal.

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