I've struggled off and on with cystic acne pretty much all my life, but it got very severe when I hit 35. My face is always hot and the pain from the pulsating cysts keeps me awake at night sometimes. I hate looking at myself in the mirror, and I hate it even more when people say stupid things. OF COURSE I've tried Proactive, Oxy, etc...I've tried every damned thing ever manufactured - I have about $4,000 worth the skin care products in my bathroom right now!!!!! The other day a coworker came up to me and said "wow, your face is breaking out, nice zits"....CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT???? I complained to my boss, but they can't fire someone for being an asshole. I literally wanted to take a blunt object and beat that person until her face looks as screwed up as mine! I get asked alot if I've ever seen a dermatoligist. DO THEY NOT GET IT?????? Everyone reading this knows what I'm talking about. I've been seeing dermatologists for two and a half years, and all I get are MORE DRUGS AND MORE BILLS TO PAY...WITH VERY POOR RESULTS!!!!!!!!!!! The past two years have been a living hell for me! I've been on so many prescriptions and topicals, it takes two pages to list them all! My new primary care doctor almos fainted when I showed her the list. I swear, there will be a cure for cancer before there's an acne product that actually works! I was taking a combination of drugs that was helping a bit, but I'm trying to get pregnant now and am off my medications. I thought the acne would give me a little break, or maybe not be as bad as before.....WRONG!!!! It's stressful enough trying to get pregnant, but now I've got this bloody, scabby, pathetic excuse for a face looking back at me in the mirror. I've been crying for 3 days straight, and get panic attacks about leaving the house. I'm normally a very positive person, but this has brought me to me knees....again. I don't know how much more I can take.
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