On November 16th 2005 my life changed forever. I was a new driver and i was only 17. I was driving home from church one night when and elderly woman was standing in front of my car. I swirved and tried not to hit her but i did.I tried to save her by taking her pulse and calling 911.. that didn't help because she died right there in front of me. My heart aches everyday and even when i try to hide it from the world i just keep seeing these pictures and i can feel that numb feeling. Does anyone understand what i mean when i say numb? I cry a lot and i don't think that i'll ever be comfortable driving again especially at night. After being in the accident it took me atleast 6 months and getting a new car to attempt getting back to "normal". I feel like a murderer a lot even though no charges were drawn against me. This year was really hard because it was the 2nd anniversary, it doesnt even feel like two years have gone by. I blame a lot of things for that night and the fact that i should have left church earlier. I am very thankful for the people who supported me through that tough time. The kids are school were awful and i lost a lot of friends through this.. All i want to know is if anyone knows how i feel.. Will the memories ever fade or will i be stuck with the ongoing movie in my head...
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