I feel so terrible this morning I went a whole week sober and this weekend fell off the wagon AGAIN! I have never had anything like this take over my life i am trying so hard to stay sober and when i have that one drink i just seem to spiral into this horrible vortex of blackness. I had thoughts of suicide last night and then i realized how selfish that would be to take my life becuase of my lack of self control and how unfair it would be to my wife. I just need to fight harder i guess this is just so hard it's awful. Thanks for listening.
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