Journal Entry for October 28, 2007
October 28, 2007 10:03am
Hey Everyone! I haven't written in awhile because I haven't been on. I am in an outpatient program which is every Monday, …
itsmestacy
11:38am, November 9, 2008
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About Me
itsmestacy
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About Me
I am very outgoing, funny, smart girl who lives with her boyfriend, dog, and cat near the shore in NJ. I suffer from anxiety, depression, and panic attacks and have for over 13 years now. It sucks but I need to learn how to deal with this and conquer it. I'm glad to see that I am not alone though! I read this in a chat and I liked it so I added it here so I could read it once and awhile. Suicide is never the best decision. It only appears that way. When you're deep in the darkness, ANY way out looks good.
I am very outgoing, funny, smart girl who lives with her boyfriend, dog, and cat near the shore in NJ. I suffer from anxiety, depression, and panic attacks and have for over 13 years now. It sucks but I need to learn how to deal with this and conquer it. I'm glad to see that I am not alone though! I read this in a chat and I liked it so I added it here so I could read it once and awhile. Suicide is never the best decision. It only appears that way. When you're deep in the darkness, ANY way out looks
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Interests
I love all sports (especially softball), NASCAR, going for bike rides and walks, playing with my dog, SOMETIMES going to the gym, garage sale shopping, and going to the boardwalk since we live near the beach.
I love all sports (especially softball), NASCAR, going for bike rides and walks, playing with my dog,
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Recent Activity
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Journal
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Journal Entry for October 2, 2007
October 2, 2007 9:40pm
What a bad past 3 days....Saturday I went to the Emergency Room because I was having problems breathing. I have bronchitus and my anxiety which …
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Journal Entry for September 18, 2007
September 18, 2007 6:07pm
"Sigh" What a day. I woke up twice in the middle of the night with anxiety attacks. I had another one on the way to work, …
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Journal Entry for September 4, 2007
September 4, 2007 6:35pm
I haven't written in awhile! It's 6:33PM on 9/4. I just got home from work a few minutes ago. I'm tired, cranky, …
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Journal Entry for August 29, 2007
August 29, 2007 6:04pm
It is 8/29 at 6:02PM. Tomorrow is my birthday!!! Yippieee! Work was ok today. Kinda dragged because it's been very very …
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Close Depression
Type: Clinical (Major) DepressionI started to suffer from anxiety at the age of 17 and I will be 30 on 8/30/07. Somewhere between 17 and now I also got depression along with a choking phobia. As of today, I had to change my medicine from Lexapro (40mg) to Celexa (40mg) because the Lexapro was costing lots of money even WITH my insurance. So now I save over 90% but am very scared since I changed medication and OF COURSE think already it's not going to work. That's my story as of now....it may change :)
Treatments
- Celexa Not Working
- Went back to Lexapro but didn't give this enough time. Made me jittery and couldn't remember anything.
- Cognitive Behavioral Therapy Working / Worked
- I loved it! I still try to practice this.
- Effexor Not Working
- was the first (I believe) to take. I probably didn't give it enough time to work. I was 17 and impatient.
- Lexapro Working / Worked
- Working but expensive as hell EVEN with my insurance.
- Paxil Somewhat Helpful
- Don't remember. My mom's on it though and loves it.
- Positive Thinking Working / Worked
- Always works but always hard to do for me...Trying not to be a pessimist anymore.
- Psychotherapy Working / Worked
- Definitely worked. Trying to be strong on my own and doing very well!
- Support from Friends & Family Working / Worked
- of course this works! It makes you feel warm and fuzzy :)
- Trazodone Not Working
- Don't remember..but I remember I tried it.
- Wellbutrin Considering
- Don't know because as soon as I heard "suicide" happened I got off it because I"m a hypocontrat as well.
- Writing Working / Worked
- I need to start doing this again. Definitely works.
- Zoloft Somewhat Helpful
- Dont' remember
Close Panic Attacks
I have been suffering from panic attacks since I was 17 and I will be 30 8/30/07. I hate them! Everytime I have one it feels different and I'm going to die. Even though it lasts maybe 2 minutes it feels like eternity and drains all my strength.
Treatments
- Effexor Not Working
- Don't remember. I took it at 17. Don't think I gave it long enough anyway.
- Paxil Working / Worked
- I believe it worked. I now take a depressant / anxiety medication.
- Trazodone Working / Worked
- I believe it worked. I now take a depressant / anxiety medication.
- Xanax Working / Worked
- This is my "emergency pill" when I have the BIG panic attack.
- Zoloft Somewhat Helpful
- I believe it worked. I now take a depressant / anxiety medication.
Open Phobia
So here's my phobia. I have the fear of choking. Funny huh? I think it is. I mean, if I'm talking and breathing...I'm not choking right? I have a list of Stacy's Top Ten most chokable foods. I choked once in my life and that is when I was two. My doctor said that it probably doesn't have anything to do with my fear. Even if food scratches my throat going down I think I'm gonna choke. Interesting huh?
Open Diets & Weight Maintenance
Not much to tell. gained weight (not sure if some of it is from my medicines) and need to lose it. I weigh approximately 215 and am 5'6. My ideal weight would be 165 lbs. I'm not weighing myself this time but going by how my clothes feel :)
Treatments
- Avoid Certain Foods / Chemicals Working / Worked
- Doing this now. I believe it's working...we will find out.
- Eating Healthier Foods Working / Worked
- Doing this now. I believe it's working...we will find out.
- Physical Exercise Working / Worked
- Doing this now. I believe it's working...we will find out.
- Eat Less Working / Worked
- Doing this now. I believe it's working...we will find out.
- Weight Watchers Somewhat Helpful
- I don't think they let you eat enough on this. The only thing that helped me is knowing someone else would see how good/bad I did that week.
Open Anxiety
I have been suffering from Anxiety and panic attacks for 13 years now. I have been able to "handle" the panic attacks better but everytime I have one I think it's the end....
Treatments
- Breathing Exercises Working / Worked
- It works if I follow through with it...usually I give in to the anxiety.
- Lexapro Working / Worked
- Worked very well however it's expensive as hell even with my insurance and doesn't have a generic form.
- Paxil Working / Worked
- wasn't on it that long. I guess it worked.
- Positive Thinking Working / Worked
- I try my best with this...not the easiest thing for me.
- Trazodone Somewhat Helpful
- I rememeber I took it..that's all. lol
- Xanax Working / Worked
- this is my emergency pill for REALLY bad panic attacks.
- Zoloft Working / Worked
- wasn't on it that long. I guess it worked.
Open Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD)
I have OCD over really wierd things like breathing, swallowing, choking, turning off light switches, making sure the stove is off, etc.
Treatments
- Lexapro Working / Worked
- So far so good. Have had bad spells lately but they come and go. Could be the season changing..
Open Hiatal Hernia
I was just diagnosed with a hiatal hernia a few days ago. Next Tuesday I have to go for the upper endoskopy or something like that.
Treatments
- Prevacid Somewhat Helpful
- Just started a few days ago. Can't tell yet if its working.
Open Seasonal Affective Disorder
I have been hospitalized (3) times now and all three have happened in October...SAD???
