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rmb2581 
Hi! This morning my usual routine was broken by my boyfriend who got up and immediately started putting the dishes away. Didn't say much. No good morning - nothing.
For background, I'm under regular doctor's treatment and I consider myself "fairly" stable with medication and therapy (and lots of prayer).
Even so, tell me if my boyfriend's change in routine this morning didn't send me into an absolute depression tailspin!
"What did I do?!?" I asked myself. I must have DONE something?! So I started cleaning the entire kitchen. I cried and cried the entire time...and wondered how I could mess things up so bad (even though I know my mind plays those tricks on me). Who knows, maybe my bf just felt like helping, but it felt like a slap to me and when I finished the kitchen, I locked myself in my office (where I still am).
I finally logged on to DS for a little understanding from people who understand. I stopped crying and I'm here, certain that I didn't DO anything to "deserve" that behavior from him and that in fact, he may have just wanted to help or was simply distracted. I asked him, but all he said was that it was a new year and he was trying to be productive. I cried some more .
You are right; the only thing we can do is talk about it. There are lots of groups in DS so look around, but from what you say, I think you are in the right place.
That little gremlin that Scared talks about is alive and well and he sticks his ugly comments in our heads about how it's all "my fault". So along with that gremlin, I have a little angel in the back of my mind telling me to get a grip. It's not you. It's not your fault and you CAN make it thru the day without sabotaging anything else.
I'm hanging around DS all morning just to make sure that I talk if I need to (which I do), help if I can, and generally just be AWARE that depression will take the best of me IF I let it. I won't let it today. One day at a time...
Hugs! 
I lost it after that...sorry to say. I wrote "WHAT DID I DO TO YOU?" on the wall with a fork. Just the silliest sht. I need control and I'm so so angry. I don't know what to do.
