Journal

I haven't changed my mind. 

I finally decided that I'm breaking up with my bf after 10 years of living together.  He is 11 years younger than me and I swear he was more mature 10 years ago than now.  I understand that only means that maybe I am more mature now than I was 10 years ago.   You can take that both ways.  Bottomline is that I'm done and there is not much now that he could possibly do to win me back (not that he's trying).

It's a lot of bull and he's a huge dick and an even bigger asshole.  I'm thru with having to walk on eggshells, I'm done with the never eating (he is a very very picky eater), I'm done with the not going anywhere (he doesn't go anywhere) and frankly, while I go to the Psychiatrist to go get my head examined and my mind in some sort of order, HE is the one that needs it.  I really believe that.

The last straw that made me see that I was making the right decision is that I sent his mom an email and said thank you for everything since she has been so nice to my daughter.  This woman forwarded the email to her husband...and he pretty much said that he was always hoping that in those 10 years his son and I would have gotten married (fat chance), and that he was always hoping that I would "accept Jesus Christ as my lord and savior", but he knows it's best for me to move on.  WHAT?! 

I was thinking maybe he would say "your welcomed and your daughter is still welcomed", but instead I got a confirmation that his family was not rooting for our success.  Bf and I are still together, well, in the same house, and he thought everything is going to be ok - I had my doubts.  He was acting like we are going to work it out...then we had another argument over his shit being everywhere (I should take a picture...I mean everywhere) and the fact that I like to live in a clean house. 

So he gives me an ultimatum.  We HAVE to go thru couples counseling or else.  Guess what bub...ELSE.  Go away.  Have a nice life.  I will be fine after a pint of chocolate ice cream!

BUT I didn't say that.  I just said I would think about it only to give me time to start figuring out what needs to be sold (as in properties), what goes with him and what I want to keep (very little).  Good riddance.  I feel a huge boulder has been lifted off my shoulders. 

Is that bad?... because I feel good...