Journal

Thought I'd post this one;

Dancing in the distance

If you were me; perhaps you'd choose differently,
bringing sunshine to my dank days,
push my insecurities away and put your arms around me.
The thing is you can't take on my life for me,
it's cowardly; and I admit that sometimes I bolt and run away from things I'm unsure of.
There's no excuse or valid explaination I can give you as to why I feign your affection,
I don't know what people expect of me.
Actually; that's not true, I suppose Iknow what people want from me,
they hope that'll I'll take responsibility, that'll I'll do the right thing, so that I'll pull through eventually.

If I don't do what people want me to, I'll be labelled many a thing, perhaps some of which are true,
however,I feel I should defend myself in some way, but truthfully I don't have a leg to stand on.

I'm not attempting to make out that what I've done and how I choose to behave is right; I know the truth inside and even if I don't show the emotion,
I feel the strain; it's pulling me down, it's tiring me out, after all I am only human, despite how empathetic I can be; 
this is why I don't want to struggle with you, I don't want to fight you and I most certainly don't want to hurt you,
honestly If I knew how to; I'd love you. 

You deserve better, commitment and stability just go away be happy,
forget me; for most part I'm pretty non-descript anyway,
lose me when you're dancing to that music and moving that body; your body,
when your laughing, when you move on to someone else and more importantly when you are truly happy; let go of me.
But remember one thing it's not because I want to get rid of you,
it's because I care about you, and recognise you're going far,
you deserve this summer you've worked hard,
express yourself, be free and let other people see your beauty,
the same way you've dazzled me.

One day perhaps we'll touch again,
in that bar down the street,
where that night my heart skipped a beat,
I'm doing this so I maybe a better person and let you down gently,
to part amicably; as friends,
knowing full well that when the sun shine's above; you'll be dancing in the distance,
maybe if I'm lucky; somewhere you'll be waiting for me.

Verse 1

It'd be easier if I knew what to say to you
this is far from a game
wishing I knew if you felt the same
is this love
I wonder if you notice me
cause you mean the world to me
wish we had a love,
like the ones you see on the tv.

Pre-chorus

Love on the tv looks so simple
so lovely
this is where we could walk hand in hand
kissing and hugging and have all day loving,
dreams of being yours
where the dates are great
and I'm never late 
where your love would always be the same
one day you might understand,
you made me better
I'll stand by you through whatever
just let me be.

chorus

I try to say things to make you understand
but there is nothing I can really say
the words are in my head
but they get stuck on in my throat 
with that feeling in my chest

pulling on my heart strings
I wish that you knew

I wish you knew

what I go through lovin' you.

Verse 2

But you don't see me
I give my heart to you
but I guess unless I say
how I really feel
that I need you as my lady
I can't complain baby
but I know if you give me a chance
I will try

oh I'll try

cause your picture perfect
and I know your worth it
like the loves I see on the tv
if only you'd love me.

Pre-chorus

Love on the tv looks so simple
so lovely
this is where we could walk hand in hand
kissing and hugging and have all day loving,
dreams of being yours
where the dates are great
 and I'm never late
and your love would always be the same
one day you may understand,
you made me better
I'll stand by you through whatever
just let me be.

chorus

I try to say things to make you understand
but there is nothing I can really say
the words are in my head
but they get stuck in my throat
with that feeling in my chest
I wish that you knew

I wish you knew

what I go through lovin' you.

You make me better
before you I was nothing 
without you now I feel like less
maybe it's for the best
the person I should of been all of these years
you make me and we could have a love
like the ones on the tv
cos the whole world should see your beautiful.