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Vteacher 
1:14am Wednesday
I went to the doctor today for my physical. I have lost 48 pounds due to depression. I had the doctor run tests for STDs. I did a stupid thing and had sex once when I was in a manic phase. I hope with all my heart, the tests come back negative. I once heard "you're only as sick as your secrets, so I'm telling This secret here. I'm ashamed of it, but I can't undo it.
Three friends have forgiven me, and I love them for it. Maybe as time goes on, more friends will forgive me.
Last night, my mom managed to stay up late enough to watch Monk with me. I think she enjoyed it. I bought a fish dinner from the Masonic Temple nerby. She kept saying how much she enjoyed it. It made me feel good. It made me realize how I have to keep making her happy while she's here with me and find joy in doing this.
I am thankful I'm skinny again, even if it is due to depression.
I am thankful for my three friends supporting me. Ohana, Penny, and SuzyQ
I am thankful I made my mom happy today.
Comments
I love Monk : ) but often I find Dad is laughing away and I have a tear sneaking out the corner. Just remember that happiness you created for her. That is a blessing to both of you and such a gift you are giving your Mom and as I say that I can hear Mom calling down to me to listen to yourself. Still find it hard to see past the hard times. BIG HUGS : ) Suzi
SuziQandCats
Oh how I wish I had my mom with me.. Your a wonderful person and a wonderful daughter!! God bless you and remember we are all sinners no matter what the sin is, God came and forgave us all of all of our sins. Be happy. Love, frieda
MrsTDC