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moodyashell 
i am putting on weight ridiculously fast and i'm really hoping its the prozac or i've got a real problem....switching to a higher dosage of wellbutrin and bagging prozac for now....hope it works because i am really really fat right now and i cant afford to keep buying new clothes. i hate my body under normal circumstances, this is almost unbearable.
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today is actually ok....i have been tracking my mania and had a week of rage and total really feeling like shit but i seem to be rising out of it. thank you pharmaceuticals. now i just hope to ride out less shitty until i crash.
i'm manic i can feel it...the meds smooth over the sleeplessness but not the rage.....i start to overanalyze everything and nothing seems to meet my expectations, not work, not my marriage, not myself.....the self loathing is in full force.....creativity switches to writing on DS, away from my usual art....everything is edgy and jagged and sharp and i'm rolling around in it.
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Goal Updated
hey! you hate your body, too? awesome! i totally hate mine! for sure! living in los angeles and new york, two of the most vain wastelands riddled with artificially beautifulish robots, can't be good for either of us. italy is where it's at. fat's the new hot there. i'll bathe in marinara! i love you..and remember this: pretty much everyone gets fat. and it starts about now. so watch as your friends start to try and deal with their newfound problems while we already know damn well how they feel! yeah! (the chipper vibe i'm giving off is supposed to be annoying. feel free to slap me. or feed me. mm. chocolate milk.)
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