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  From SST June 19

  LITTLE JOHNNY STRIKES AGAIN..........
  
  
  
  The teacher asked the class to use the word "fascinate" in a sentence.
  
  Molly put up her hand and said, "My family went to my grand dad's farm, and we all saw his pet sheep. It was fascinating."
  
  The teacher said, "That was good, but I wanted you to use the word "fascinate, not fascinating".
  
  Sally raised her hand. She said, "My family went to see Rock City and I was "fascinated."
  
  The teacher said, "Well, that was good Sally, but I wanted you to use the word "fascinate."
  
  Little Johnny raised his hand. The teacher hesitated because she had been burned by little Johnny before. She finally decided there was no way he could damage the word "fascinate", so she called on him. Johnny said, "My aunt Gina has a sweater with ten buttons, but her tits are so big she can only fasten eight."
  
  The teacher sat down and cried!

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  From SST March 30

  My first job was working in an orange juice factory, but I got canned...couldn't concentrate. I tried working in a muffler factory but that...was exhausting. I wanted to be a barber, but...I just couldn't cut it. I attempted to be a deli worker, but any way I sliced it, I...couldn't cut the mustard. I studied a long time to become a doctor, but I...didn't have any patience. I worked in a shoe factory; I tried but I...just didn't fit in. I managed to get a good job working for a pool maintenance company, but the work was...just too draining. After many years of trying to find steady work I finally got a job as a historian until I realized there was...no future in it. So, I retired and found I'm a perfect fit for it!

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  From SST January 17

  THE WEDDING NIGHT Fred and Mary get married but couldn't afford a honeymoon, so they go back to Fred's Mom and Dad's house for their first night together. In the morning, Johnny, Fred's little brother, gets up and has his breakfast. As he is going out of the door to go to school, he asks his mom if Fred and Mary are up yet. She replies, 'No'. Johnny asks, 'Do you know what I think?' His mom replies, 'I don't want to hear what you think! Just go to school.' Johnny comes home for lunch and asks his mom, 'Are Fred and Mary up yet?' She replies, 'No.' Johnny says, 'Do you know what I t hink?' His mom replies, 'Never mind what you think! Eat your lunch and go back to school .' After school, Johnny comes home and asks again, 'Are Fred and Mary up yet?' His mom says, 'No.' He asks, 'Do you know what I think?' His mom replies, 'Ok, now tell me what you think?' He says: 'Last night Fred came to my room for the Vaseline and I think... I gave him my airplane glue.'

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  From SST November 26, 2008

  You can change the world with every breath you take, and as you go about creating every moment in that truth, you create a world that resonates with you every moment of your life. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- A mouse looked through the crack in the wall to see the farmer and his wife open a package. What food might this contain?' the mouse wondered - - - he was devastated to discover it was a mousetrap. Retreating to the farmyard, the mouse proclaimed the warning : There is a mousetrap in the house! There is a mousetrap in the house!' The chicken clucked and scratched, raised her head and said, 'Mr.Mouse, I can tell this is a grave concern to you, but it is of no consequence to me. I cannot be bothered by it.' The mouse turned to the pig and told him, 'There is a mousetrap in the house! There is a mousetrap in the house!' The pig sympathized, but said, 'I am so very sorry, Mr.Mouse, but there is nothing I can do about it but pray. Be assured you are in my prayers.' The mouse turned to the cow and said, 'There is a mousetrap in the house! There is a mousetrap in the house!' The cow said, 'Wow, Mr. Mouse. I'm sorry for you, but it's no skin off my nose.' So, the mouse returned to the house, head down and dejected, to face the farmer's mousetrap . . . alone. That very night a sound was heard throughout the house -- like the sound of a mousetrap catching its prey. The farmer's wife rushed to see what was caught. In the darkness, she did not see it was a venomous snake whose tail the trap had caught. The snake bit the farmer's wife. The farmer rushed her to the hospital, and she returned home with a fever. Everyone knows you treat a fever with fresh chicken soup, so the farmer took his hatchet to the farmyard for the soup's main ingredient. But his wife's sickness continued, so friends and neighbors came to sit with her around the clock. To feed them, the farmer butchered the pig. The farmer's wife did not get well; she died. So many people came for her funeral, the farmer had the cow slaughtered to provide enough meat for all of them. The mouse looked upon it all from his crack in the wall with great sadness. So, the next time you hear someone is facing a problem and think it doesn't concern you, remember ---- when one of us is threatened, we are all at risk. We are all involved in this journey called life. We must keep an eye out for one another and make an extra effort to encourage one another. REMEMBER. . . . . E ACH OF US IS A VITAL THREAD IN ANOTHER PERSON'S TAPESTRY; OUR LIVES ARE WOVEN TOGETHER FOR A REASON. One of the best things to hold onto in this world is a FRIEND. HAPPY THANKSGIVING,GREAT BIG OLE GRIZZLY BEAR HUGGGZZZZ SQUISHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

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  From SST November 25, 2008

  Did Anyone Ever Tell You Just How Special You Are. The Light that You Emit Might even Light a Star Did Anyone Ever Tell You How Important You Make Others Feel. Somebody out here is Smiling, because of something you said or something you did! Did Anyone Ever Tell You that Many Times When They were Sad Your Huggzz Made Them Smile. In Fact, It made Them Glad. Did Anyone Ever Tell You Just How Much They Like You. Well, My Dearest Friend Today I am Telling You. I believe that without a friend you are missing out on a lot!!! Have a nice day, and I'm glad we are friends!!!

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