startingover76's Journal

I really can't take what my life has once again turned into.  My boyfriend went alone to his aunt and uncle's 50th anniversary party.  I haven't even got the chance to meet these people.  I told him last night, it just wasn't a good time for me to meet new people because when they ask questions about me...well there aren't too many good answers.  I am out of work until a miracle doctor finds a cure for my fainting, dizzines, and migraines; I am severely depressed, and my face is this puffy because I have been on predizone for a month now, and if that doesn't work, I get to go on it again...and oh yeah, sorry about the way this out fit looks on me...I can't afford anything new because I have driven myself into a hole I can't climb out of by myself.  God I hate myself for even talking this way.  I used to be so positive, not anymore.  I truly hate myself right now, for feeling so sorry for myself, and letting life pass me by, but right now, all I can manage is just making it through the day.  I WANT MY LIFE BACK!!!!!  I WANT TO BE HAPPY AGAIN!!!  Anyone got a magic wand?  Right now, I would settle for a good sleeping pill to get this day over with.  My head is killing me.