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Crossroads 
Thanks to those who responded for your empathy and caring. Life is always challenging. I have put careful thought into my dilemma and have a plan. My husband is taking responsibility for his actions and seeking help. I'm focusing on staying healthy and channeling my energy into my work. A trip to my doctor yesterday provided me reassurance that the baby is healthy. My eyes filled with tears when I saw the heartbeat and found out the baby was okay. It looks so peaceful. I could see the spine and it had a cute little shape. I'm 13 weeks.
I also discussed my decision with loved ones, and a counselor. We are going to live apart while he seeks professional help. Last night I went with him to a Gamblers Anonymous meeting. I was amazed at how many people attended. Our state offers a free 36 day inpatient program for habitual gamblers. I learned it is one of only three places in the world that provides this no charge inpatient service. It is paid for by a federal grant.
My husband spoke to the group at the end of the meeting and admitted his problem, and said he wants to get better for his wife and baby. Today my husband will speak to a counselor one-on-one.
It is extremely difficult to understand an addict's behavior, it seems illogical to me, but I am trying. I can forgive him at this point in time, but cannot forget. I thick forgiveness is an important gift you give someone, but it would be unhealthy to pretend life is back to normal. I do not want to be an enabler. I have decided to live apart while he gets help. It's a difficult decision, since I think it is better for couples to stay together when there are problems versus separating. That's what you marriage vows say, however, the wound is still too fresh. I cannot get the name of the pornography website he viewed out of my mind. Right now I need to create a calm and save environment for my baby.
I also discussed my decision with loved ones, and a counselor. We are going to live apart while he seeks professional help. Last night I went with him to a Gamblers Anonymous meeting. I was amazed at how many people attended. Our state offers a free 36 day inpatient program for habitual gamblers. I learned it is one of only three places in the world that provides this no charge inpatient service. It is paid for by a federal grant.
My husband spoke to the group at the end of the meeting and admitted his problem, and said he wants to get better for his wife and baby. Today my husband will speak to a counselor one-on-one.
It is extremely difficult to understand an addict's behavior, it seems illogical to me, but I am trying. I can forgive him at this point in time, but cannot forget. I thick forgiveness is an important gift you give someone, but it would be unhealthy to pretend life is back to normal. I do not want to be an enabler. I have decided to live apart while he gets help. It's a difficult decision, since I think it is better for couples to stay together when there are problems versus separating. That's what you marriage vows say, however, the wound is still too fresh. I cannot get the name of the pornography website he viewed out of my mind. Right now I need to create a calm and save environment for my baby.
Comments
i am proud of him for doing that and getting help for himself and you and your baby. Living apart might give him prespective on what he might lose if he doesn't change his ways. and what you are saying about your baby is so true. Just remain calm and you'll be fine. remember we are all here for you.
zoey200823