I'm not at my best today...my husband …
I'm not at my best today...my husband is at the end of his rope and so am I. I spend the mortgage money again and he …
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cmain 
I am hurting so bad. Apparently while I am sleeping at night my husband is calling the smut lines. I can't believe he did this. I thought we were over the pornography thing. I guess in his mind since he is not watching movies or on the web cam, this would be acceptable. I don't understand when you have a warm body next to you, that never says no, and would do just about anything, why would you want to go elsewhere. He turns me down. When we do it, it's lame, he's only into his pleasure. He is not an intimate person, and this is making matters worse. He is in AA, so I told him he needs to speak to his sponser. If I still had insurance, I would insist he comes with me to see my counselor. We have been together 3 years, married for 1. Is this going to get worse?
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Hi cmain
The lack of intimacy...the desire for fantasy and excitement over real sex...the progression from one form of arousal (porn) to another (smut lines) strongly indicates that he is a sex addict.
If this is true, it will get worse. He has a chemical dependence (dopamine) which means his brain will continue to want stronger and stronger stimuli ...unless he gets "clean".
He also probably has deep emotional scarring which he needs to address in therapy. Many sex addicts have other addictions as well...like alcoholism.
You probably know from your experience with him through AA that addicts need people who will help them face reality...not enable their addictions.
Stay strong.
colin
colinsm