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dolphingirl 
Today I feel a bit flat, sensitive to criticism, and low self esteem. I have been binging, and weight is coming on fast...I think I will stop when I rech a certain weight, a personal hitting bottum if you will, then I go over that and get depressed this is the heaviest I have EVER been in my life. I also take meds for bi-polar and feel that sometimes the meds have somethinng to do with it, and I feel stuck...gooff meds and risk decompensating mentally, yet feel better physically. I make attempts at eating healthier, then sabatoge my efforts... I alternate between feeling I don't care and let go of self care, then trying one more day at a time. I feel stuck, in a rut.
