Like a little stray puppy.
November 19, 2009 1:14pm
Javid popped up on my doorstep the other day- throwing a wrench in my plans to move on with my life leaving him in the dust. I didn't take …
JennaB
1:10pm Thursday
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About Me
JennaB
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About Me
I have been a member of the Daily Strength(DS) for over a year now, and I have grown and learned so much about myself in this time. Over three years ago, I was alone in the world, living on the streets of San Francisco, a strung out hustler. My struggle to change my life was a difficult one, and it seemed as soon as I managed to get off the drugs, my Major Depressive Disorder and PTSD took over and my life remained in a bad place. Through Hard work and determination, with the help of a therapist I have managed to build a life for myself, one that includes a healthy loving relationship with my Javid. A fulfilling career with Project Homeless Connect, which is an amazing thing that is replicated in over 180 Cities worldwide. Life isn't perfect, and I am certainly not. BUt I have realized that all that doesn't matter. Living life in the moment is very important to me these days after years of just coasting through it numb on a mission to commit a slow suicide one needle at a time.
I have been a member of the Daily Strength(DS) for over a year now, and I have grown and learned so much about myself in this time. Over three years ago, I was alone in the world, living on the streets of San Francisco, a strung out hustler. My struggle to change my life was a difficult one, and it seemed as soon as I managed to get off the drugs, my Major Depressive Disorder and PTSD took over and my life remained in a bad place. Through Hard work and determination, with the help of a therapist
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Interests
I believe it is my calling to be of service to others so I volunteer regularly, I enjoy curling up with a good movie and a bowl of popcorn, taking long walks with no peticuliar destination, coffee and good conversation, and being creative. I love quiet evenings making dinner of my boyfriend, as well as the occasional club scene. I seek beauty and ignore fault.
I believe it is my calling to be of service to others so I volunteer regularly, I enjoy curling up with
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Journal
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Moving forward into my life.
November 14, 2009 8:06pm
I don't think I mentioned in my journal yesterday that at one point, I neurotically searched through the labor/move section of craigslist in the …
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"It makes me so sad that love sometimes isn't enough."
November 13, 2009 5:18pm
The other night, Javid and I spent making love over and over, 4 times- he just couldn't get enough of me. The next day he not only …
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Drinking problem
November 2, 2009 8:17pm
Today has been a good day, I suppose. I didn't really do much but hang out around the house, which I will not be able to do as much once I …
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Jenna's Mixed Bag and katchuup
November 1, 2009 2:04pm
I just decided to go ahead and get my laptop out rather than wait till I could afford to do so- cause honestly that day may not come! Actually …
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Hugbook
Congrats
Yes..........I am so proud of you.......You have given that relationship your "Best" and I think you deserve so much better! Please keep in touch ok?
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Miss You
Hey Girl....... Where ya been???? I tried your cell today but it was off!! I miss talking to you. I hope things are going better? Jenny
Rainbow
Jenna,
Just saying hello and offering myself as a friend. Your status statement is true and you can accomplish anything if you put your mind to it. Take care and God Bless you always.
Hugs,
Chris
Flower
HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY!
LV,
JON
Little Love
how ya doin girl? just popped in 4 a mo n thought id drop u a line (wish u could return me a life one know wot i mean?) hope all goes well wiv u n hope 2 catch up wiv ya soon xxx
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Photos
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Support Groups
Close Physical & Emotional Abuse
my story is still not completely recovered i have periods of time in my childhood i do not remember, but i believe there was sexual abuse, all of my relationships have either been short lived or lengthy and mentally and physically abusive, when i was in college i was almost beaten to death adn raped by a man in Dallas, Texas who went on and raped and murdered several queens like me afterward, growing up in texas i never fit in and was constantly miss treated for starterd
Treatments
- Psychotherapy Working / Worked
- I am dual diagnosis, i have major depressive disorder and PTSD, so i kind therapy to be an excellent tool to keep my head above water and also exaime the things that make me act out in a safe structured enviroment
- Psychotherapy Working / Worked
- I am dual diagnosis, i have major depressive disorder and PTSD, so i kind therapy to be an excellent tool to keep my head above water and also exaime the things that make me act out in a safe structured enviroment
Close Depression
Type: Clinical (Major) Depressioni have major depressive disorder, which for me mainfests it's self in sometimes incapacitating dread and if untreated i spend weeks at a time just starring at the walls, i a afraid to interact with other people, out of fear of rejection, and have anxiety attacks, and a cripplingly negative self dialouge, it has been a part of my life for as long as i can remember, but when i was younger it didn't have the strength it has now.
Treatments
- Effexor Working / Worked
- BuSpar Working / Worked
- the combination of these four drugs have given me back a sense of self and have lifted this overwhelming weight fo sadness and toxic self talk.
- Trazodone Working / Worked
- It is hard to put into words just how much the right medication has helped me, it took me almost a year of pure hell, ups and downs, to find the right combo.
- Methadone Working / Worked
- but when you do, it's like a fog lifting, i have found that my need to self medicate with drugs has left me as well, for the most part. I am not cured but it is doable.
Open Homelessness
because of drug addiction, major depressive disorder, and PTSD, I lived on the streets surviving by prostitution, selling drugs, and even at times pushing a shopping cart and collecting cans. This was an extremely difficult time in my life, I suffered through many horrific experiences from being woken up by being punched in the face, to having the high way patrol harass and confinscate all my belongs, leaving me barefoot without a coat or blanket in winter.
Open Hepatitis C
Due to my past of I.V. drug use I contracted this virus four or five years ago, and I have recently have taken a battery of blood test. abdominal sonograms, and soon a liver biopsy in order to decided whether or not I should undergo interferon treatment. So far I know that I am Genoa type 1 which is less likely to be cured by interferon. Which means gives me a 40%-45% likely hood the treatment will be successful. And of course the side effects are horrible, but there is a chance.
Open Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder
I have experienced violence both physical and verbal on many occasions that were never addressed until 2005 in san francisco, ca
Treatments
- BuSpar Working / Worked
- in combination with effexor, methadone and trazadone, I have noticed that i am a lot more level headed and do not flash, or have attacks as much.
Open Sexual Abuse
I have suspected for a long time that something happened to me as a child, and the last week of August I remembered some details proving to myself that there was abuse. I am still putting the pieces to together about this truth.
Treatments
