Well! A "DougHug". Thanks so much! …
Well! A "DougHug". Thanks so much! My son is twelve, and was officially diagnosed with P.D.D./N.O.S.; I think of it …
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emmataylor 
I went to our local ASD support group, I learnt alot of thing and met some other mums, got the details of another support group that is specifically for Dads. So the hubby has no excuses really. I also learned somethings about myself.
I realised that I need to mourn, I keep tearing up and then stopping the tears before they can take hold, I still haven't cried it out I need to watch Armageddon or something to get them started! I also realised that Hubby will catch up. I spoke to a chap there about the Hubby, he said that because men are generally out of the home working they are always going to be stunned and shocked at the diagnosis even though we have been telling the dolts for however long we have been fretting. This fellow said that in some cases it can take up to 2 years for the men to come to terms with the whole caboodle. They first have to get through all the emotions we did months ago, then they have to grieve the idea of the son(or daughter) they had pictured during the nine months before they were born, mourn the dream of taking the son to the pub for the first time, going to watch them playing rugby for England all that kind of stuff! Once they realise that as an intelligent and focused individual they could win the nobel prize of science they are okay! I think women have different dreams for their children and it always centres around the idea that they are HAPPY.
The husband will get there, It's just so BLOODY FRUSTRATING.
I realised that I need to mourn, I keep tearing up and then stopping the tears before they can take hold, I still haven't cried it out I need to watch Armageddon or something to get them started! I also realised that Hubby will catch up. I spoke to a chap there about the Hubby, he said that because men are generally out of the home working they are always going to be stunned and shocked at the diagnosis even though we have been telling the dolts for however long we have been fretting. This fellow said that in some cases it can take up to 2 years for the men to come to terms with the whole caboodle. They first have to get through all the emotions we did months ago, then they have to grieve the idea of the son(or daughter) they had pictured during the nine months before they were born, mourn the dream of taking the son to the pub for the first time, going to watch them playing rugby for England all that kind of stuff! Once they realise that as an intelligent and focused individual they could win the nobel prize of science they are okay! I think women have different dreams for their children and it always centres around the idea that they are HAPPY.
The husband will get there, It's just so BLOODY FRUSTRATING.
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Sometimes I think Dad's need it the most. Especially if it is about their son's. Dad's have his image of what their son will be like and then he's not. They don't know what to do. Society doesn't always expect Dad's to be as nurturing so they are at ends on how to deal. Dad's need other Dad's words and feelings not always from the wives. Once their own feelings are validated they seem to become better fathers, more connected. Less distant. Good Luck!
challenger