Gave into cutting :-(
November 24, 2009 7:00am
Well I didn't make it. I gave in last night! UGH! I was dong so well and I just broke! It was only one deep cut though! I usually cut many …
brok3nbutterfly83
2:48am
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About Me
brok3nbutterfly83
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About Me
I'm a 26 year old married mom or one. I've struggled with self injury since I was 13. I have major recurrent depression, Generalized Anxiety, PMDD, and dependent personality. I have a huge fear of abandonment, I'm a highly sensitive person with a very low self esteem. I've been in an emotionally and physically abusive relationship for 8 years. Though it has gotten a lot better I fear that it will turn to that again! I want to improve my life. I want to feel better about myself. I want to be happy, not worry about everything and just be able to live from day to day. I live in South Carolina but was born and raised in Louisiana.
I'm a 26 year old married mom or one. I've struggled with self injury since I was 13. I have major recurrent depression, Generalized Anxiety, PMDD, and dependent personality. I have a huge fear of abandonment, I'm a highly sensitive person with a very low self esteem. I've been in an emotionally and physically abusive relationship for 8 years. Though it has gotten a lot better I fear that it will turn to that again! I want to improve my life. I want to feel better about myself. I want to be happy,
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Website
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Interests
Spending time with my family, scrapbook, listening to music, watching movies, reading and writing.
Spending time with my family, scrapbook, listening to music, watching movies, reading and writing.
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Journal
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Goal Updates...
November 23, 2009 5:39am
Self Esteem - a little better. Thinking positive! Listing 5 things daily I like about myself.
Cutting - Still going strong! Haven't gave in …
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Self Esteem & Cutting
November 17, 2009 6:10am
Self Esteem - Feeling a little better about myself. Not much but you gotta start somewhere! :-)
Cutting - Doing pretty good on that part! …
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Confused...worried and don't know what's best!!!
November 17, 2009 5:53am
I just don't know what to do. I found out today that I'm going to get to go to Louisiana my home state for Christmas. While this …
This entry is private
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Hugbook
Little Love
Thank you Lord Jesus! I have rec'd many, many generous donations for Soldiers at Cindi's Thanksgiving Day to feed the Troops. We are planning to feed the Troops again at Christmas at a friend's church that is near Tinker Air Force Base. Wishing all of my DS frienda a fabulous, healthy, and Happy Thanksgiving!! Giant hugs from OKC!! Cindi
Well Done
It's a really tough one, so good for you for sticking with it.
Go For It
I know you can reach your goals!! It's a going to be a long road but it'll feel so good along the way with your friends surrounding you and ultimate success will be when you look a you and say, mmm hmmm I did it! Yeay!
Well Done
Great job!
Sympathy
Hi broken butterfly,
The best thing you can do for you is find a book on raising your self esteem, like The Courage to be Yourself, A Woman's Guide to Emotional Strength and Self-Esteem, by Sue Patton Thoele.
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Photos
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Support Groups
Close Self-Injury
To get support and to support others.
Treatments
- Psychotherapy Considering
- Can't seem to go to an appointment that has not been canceled!!! Ready to give up on it!
- Rubber Bands Not Working
- Doesn't help me at all!
- S.A.F.E. (Self-Abuse Finally Ends) Too Soon to Tell
- Just read the book and doing the assignments in it.
- Squeezing Ice Not Working
- Doesn't help with the urges.
- Talking Working / Worked
- I have an online support group I've started several years ago it has helped alot. It gives me somewhere to go when I feel like I have no place.
Close Depression
Type: Clinical (Major) DepressionTo support others and to get help.
Treatments
- Positive Thinking Working / Worked
- Recently started but so far going well.
- Prozac Working / Worked
- Been on it a month and I'm not near as depressed as I use to be. Still get depressed though just not as bad.
- Psychotherapy Considering
- Haven't been going long. Was helping until she started canceling every appointment!
- Support from Friends & Family Working / Worked
- The best support!!
- Writing Working / Worked
- It always helps to get things out!
Open Anxiety
To support others and get support.
Treatments
- Breathing Exercises Somewhat Helpful
- It helps sometimes.
- Prozac Considering
Open Insomnia
To get to know others with the same problem.
Treatments
- Counting Sheep Not Working
- Never works lol.
- Music Somewhat Helpful
- Sometimes it helps relax me so I can rest and sleep better.
Open Irritable Bowel Syndrome (IBS)
Treatments
- High Fiber Diet Working / Worked
- It's helps at times a good bit.
Open Physical & Emotional Abuse
To talk to others that know what it's like. To get support and to support others.
Treatments
- Music Somewhat Helpful
- Music is my escape. I love it and it helps take a lot off me!!
- Psychotherapy Somewhat Helpful
- Having a hard time getting in to see her lately!!!
- Talking Working / Worked
- Talking helps a lot!!
Open Diets & Weight Maintenance
To help get support for weight loss. Share tips and encourage others.
Treatments
- Eating Healthier Foods Working / Worked
- Eating healthier foods keep me from eating junk food and helps feel full.
- Eat Less Too Soon to Tell
- I've been watching my portions lately and trying to eat less.
- Physical Exercise Working / Worked
- I have a Wii fit that I use and it's fun. I exercise without really knowing it. I also try to walk daily.
- Slim-Fast Too Soon to Tell
- I love the shakes and try to keep them in the house. They help me control my hunger.
