cat16's Journal

We all do things we regret and say things we don't mean. Sometimes we lie to save ourselves. But when times get rough and things go bad, we try to find a way out any way we can. So do we lie and lie and lie to make a way out...then get caught but try to reason. Or do we tell the truth and be embarrased and hurt for a long time. I'm ashamed, and things are catching up with me. My past actions will break my present and scar my future. I'm scared. I"m sad. My heart is racing. I dance to get rid of my thoughts, to lose myself in the music and forget life for the short hour I do it in. But it's not keeping all my thoughts away, it's not slowing down the beat of my heart, it's not rewinding the hands of time so I can redo my life in a different way. I'm a screw up. I'm a bad girl. I make more mistakes in a week than some might in a month. Why? Why? Why? It's frustrating. It's terrifying. It's...disappointing. I want everything to pass, so my secret doesn't come out. Secrets always come out though at the right time....Even though that moment has passed, a new moment will come....why?