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Josie63 
Today is one of those days ,,,
I am super depressed and this Fibro pulling me even more down,,,
I am so sick of this Illness and how it affects my whole life over the years ,,my daily actions.
Bad enough we have so much pain,,all over our bodies,,heartburn's, muscle cramps, allergies, vision problems,,and whatever comes with it,,
NO that's not enough ,,
It is said that Fibro is a Illness that nobody can see ,that's why they always think we are healthy,,or just have a bad day.
BUT,,,
Fibro shows,,
I look in the mirror and what do I see,,a swollen face / eyes like I've been crying for days ,,dark blue -purplish under eye circles like somebody beat me up,,,
my skin looks OLD and tired ,,worn out ( I know we all age ,,but that's not what I mean ),,,pale with no life in it ,,my body skin drys out ,,I put lotion on and when I finished on 1 end I could start all over again,,coz if I don't it will itch and looks dried out like I never use Lotion !
It shows by the way I walk or stand ,,I used to stand straight ,,had self esteem..now I walk or stand with my shoulders and face down to the ground,,my daughter always tells me ,,Mom u look like a lil sick poor girly ,,not woman !!
( she don't mean it in a bad way )
It affects my Style,,
I am a high heel and tight clothes lover ,,I got many many many shoes and clothes,,
I can't wear neither anymore,,I wear a tight dress --my stomach sticks out as like I am 6 month pregnant,,(always bloated)..high heels ,,Hell,,just to try to fit my foot in them will give me a cramp,,,when its finally in there and I dare to wear it for about 1 hour going somewhere,,boy --I regret it for 1 week,,my toes hurt ,,every muscle and bone that's in my foot kills me,,,
my Hair,,
I am a hairdresser ( I used to be,,,not working anymore ) and I used to love doing all kinds of things to and with my hair,,,now I can't do anything with them actually ,,as soon as I wear them UP,,my head and actually face is killing me,,it feels like somebody pulls my hair like crazy!!
it also “showes” in my way of talking,,,I forget Words,,I forget in the middle of talking what we were talking about or what I actually wanted to say ,,,I can't swich from german to english like I used to,,
I talk english to a german and they look at me like ,,what the hell did she just say ,,and I don't even realize it!!!
My Actions:
I drive to the store,,all of a sudden I think of my car and house keys,,so I look for them,,,,but I am driving,,so where is my key ??..DUHHHH
I have my wallet under my arm,,,and make the whole family nuts by telling everybody I lost my wallet,,,
I leave the house and I can NOT remember ,,did I or didn't I turn off the Stove,,the coffeemaschine and and,,so I have to turn around just to make sure,,
U ask me what did I do yesterday or what I was wearing or eating ,,,80 out of 100 times I HAVE NO IDEA!!!
last but not least..SEX,,
after having sex,,my stomach hurts like everything got “pushed up”,,my Overies burn and hurt for days ,,my whole stomach is bloaded really really painful bloaded,,my body aches all over like I just got tortured!!!
so FIBRO SHOWES,,not just in LOOKS but in our Actions as well
Comments
Hello, so sorry you are not feeling well, at all today. It is so very difficult to have positive thoughts and to 'look positive' when you are hurting so much.
I really do feel for you, as you have a list of "laundry" (ailments) that seem to be fighting against each other to see which one can make you feel the worst.
About the bloating, cramping, etc., I just wonder if you may possibly have Celiac Disease. I had never heard of it until I was diagnosed almost 2 years ago. It caused a huge amount of bloating, cramps, painful sex and generalized "pain all over" -- it mimics fibromyalgia in a lot of ways - especially the pain. It can also be fatal if you continue to eat an non-gluten-free diet, so I had to make some drastic changes there, but the changes did make about a 40% difference in how bad my pain was.
Just a suggestion, as you are inflicted by many different illnesses, so who knows - perhaps, you have celiac disease as well. Worth checking into, as it can relieve a lot of the pain when you deal with it properly.
Bless you, and I hope that you begin to feel better soon. Maybe there is a friend that would be willing to come and 'do your hair' - that always is relaxing to me, when the person is doing it 'gently' - and this may make you feel just a tad better.
SafeNSerene