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  • About Me

    Image of HiveGuy

    HiveGuy

    Male, 32, Separated
    TX, USA
    Member since September 10

    • About Me

      Scared. Confused. Lost. Alone... There used to be a human in here. Maybe there is somewhere, but he is lost, and has no way out of the deep. Wasting away to a haunt, or spectre. Turning into a vaporous ghost with sockets that creak, and deep dark hollows. Sockets, and hollows. Sockets and hollows.

      Scared. Confused. Lost. Alone... There used to be a human in here. Maybe there is somewhere, but he is lost, and has no way out of the deep. Wasting away to a haunt, or spectre. Turning into a vaporous ghost with sockets that creak, and deep dark hollows. Sockets, and hollows. Sockets and hollows.

    • Interests

      Finding the end of my crazy brick road... Looking for the sepia world.... Hoping it was all just a dream... You were there, and you, and you....

      Finding the end of my crazy brick road... Looking for the sepia world.... Hoping it was all just a dream...

  • Recent Activity

    Recently:

    • 11 hugs received, 10 hugs given, 5 journal comments

    Today

    Yesterday

    Friday

    • HiveGuy gave MeGoobie superhero status 10:34pm

      I'm happy you were able to tough it through the hard talk with your mom. Proud of you, kid. You're a…  
  • Journal

    • Good Boy

      Mood November 11, 2009 12:03pm

      Go to sleep every night... later and later. Even the haze of fairly dopefucked doesn't put me out like it did.  I'm hazy, but lie ever …

    • thing

      Mood November 11, 2009 2:52am

      I don't know anymore... Not a thing. 

       

      I know that I am full of will to be... but be what?

      I know that I am afraid, but no longer can put …

    • OH MY FUCKING GOD!!!!

      Mood November 9, 2009 7:49pm

      Driving on post today did me in... panic... panic... everything is guarded by soldiers with weapons... just like when I was in afghanistan. Felt like …

    • Lyrical Madness

      Mood November 8, 2009 5:44pm

      Not perfect... work in progress... need an instrumental break in there somewhere...I normally just add those as I play wherever it works …
    • No takers

      Mood November 8, 2009 4:48am

      No takers  on the house husband front... 

       

      Oh, well...

       

      did I mention I have excellent skills such as:

       

      -fantastic cook …

    Read Journal

  • Hugbook

    Give HiveGuy a hug



    • Hug

      From kktylo Today

      Just sending a hug your way ;0)

    • Moment of Peace

      From stronsister Yesterday

      It seemed appropriate for your humanistic nature.

    • Chocolate

      From Wish4BigSky Friday

      Did somebody say COOOOKIES??? LOL. I hope you are doing great tonight! I have been offline the last couple of days. Working a lot, thank Goodness! Huge Hugs to you.....would you consider being a pool boy? I mean, I would have to buy a pool, but...... LMAO!

    • Kiss

      From stronsister Friday

      A kiss?!!!! Well well, you are going to be a great househusband. Thank-you. A lot.

    • Get Well Soon!

      From stronsister Friday

      Thinking of you...I just know things are looking up!

    Read Hugbook

  • Goals

    Progress

    15 %

    Goal End Date is Dec 31, 09 39 more days.

    Progress

    0 %

    Goal End Date is Dec 10, 09 18 more days.
  • Support Groups

    • Close Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder

      No story here... just a fucked up man trying to find his way out of the forest...

      Treatments

      Ambien Not Working
      Quit it after one month... Did no good. Made me have strange thoughts...
      Ativan Somewhat Helpful
      Very good, but slow acting. You need to be able to identify triggers and dose prior to the shit storm hitting you.
      Cognitive Behavioral Therapy Somewhat Helpful
      My therapist sometimes takes me down paths I don;t think are helpful, but overall he is very good.
      Effexor Working / Worked
      First anti depressant that didn;t make me more depressed.
      EMDR Not Working
      Did not work on me.. Others have a great time with it... I just didn't.
      Music Working / Worked
      Folk music calms me. I listen to it when I sleep, and it helps my sleeping be more restful.
      Neurontin Somewhat Helpful
      Makes me sorta loopy but helps with nerve pain
      Prazosin Somewhat Helpful
      Supossed to surpress dreams. Sometimes it does...
      Psychotherapy Somewhat Helpful
      Seroquel Not Working
      Made me awake, but totally dopefucked... Not fun, being high as hell, and not sleeping
      Wellbutrin Working / Worked
      This has helped me tremendously. I feel much better the longer I take this. I believe it is the only med that works on the dopamine centers of the brain, and maybe that's where I was deficient.
      Zoloft Not Working
      Horrible!!!! Felt like I was dying... Made me more suicidal.
    • Close Anxiety

      AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

      Treatments

      Ambien Working / Worked
      Ativan Working / Worked
      Wellbutrin Working / Worked
    • Open Vegetarians & Vegans
      Type: Vegan

      Not an ethical vegan... Medical reasons... kept losing weight. 176 to 135 in just a few months. Vomited everything I ate. Cut gluten, and animal products. Slowly gaining weight back, and not retching.

    • Open Celiac Disease

      Got's the Celiac... sucks.

      Treatments

      Avoid Certain Foods / Chemicals Working / Worked
      Casein-Free Diet Working / Worked
      Dairy-Free Diet Working / Worked
      Gluten Free Diet Working / Worked
  • Friends


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