Well, its been 6 months and this the first time that I have journaled. They say it helps so here goes. I was raking leaves yesterday and I missed my partner. We were always outside doing things together. I looked back and seen the back of my house and thought what how the hell am I supposed to keep going. We did all of this for what? Nothing... All our dreams down the tube. It seems like I miss him more now than ever. This is supposed to get better? God John I miss you so much. We never talked about this because we thought we had so much more time to be together. Its been 6 months since I kissed you or held you or talked to you. I just don't know how I am going to pull through this. I guess I was left here without you for a reason. Just can't figure out why? I will try to be strong for you and the family. I love you baby!
Julie






You talking about being out in the yard reminded me so much of the 1st spring without Dan when I was out picking up branches that had fallen in the winter...I almost fell to the ground as it hit me he wasn't with me. I guess we keep going by putting one foot in front of another. The 1st year I went to grief support, and I tried to keep praying that God will take care of Dan until my mission here is over. No way is that easy...the grief, loneliness, and anger...and the questions (why?!) have constantly been present. Wishing you some strength and comfort. Sue
Sue0216
P.S. And we are here for you.
Sue0216