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About Me
Aly1
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Support Groups
Close Self-Injury
I have been a self-injurer since November 2008, but have been realizing that there have been indicators that it may have really started before then. My view of SI keeps fluctuating, but not many people truly understand or want to talk about it, and...I need someone to talk to.
Treatments
- Psychotherapy Considering
- It did when I really wanted to stop? and needed to, because otherwise I'd've died. But even then, I always felt like crap taking up their time, and that they were so much better than I was, so why should I take up their time? I'm sure as hell not important enough for them to listen.
- Red Marker Not Working
- I mean, it worked at first, but what I really needed was the pain, the scars, the sense that I could control how much I was hurting and mirror that pain. I can convince myself of a lot of things, but not that the red marks were actually cuts.
- Rubber Bands Not Working
- Not the same kind of pain? Not sharp enough to use this instead of cutting or the other types of SI that I've used. People ask too many questions also...questions that I'd rather not answer. It made me feel like I was doing something wrong when they did ask or notice and not ask.
- Talking Somewhat Helpful
- Sometimes it was somewhat triggering, but keeping those emotions, those feelings, those thoughts all bottled up didn't allow for me to feel any better, since the sense of isolation is part of what caused me to start in the first place.
Close College Stress
College stress...need I say more?
Treatments
- Sleep Working / Worked
- It works when I actually have the time to do so. But if my schedule is completely full and I do end up sleeping, I just feel guilty b/c it seems as though that time I spent sleeping should've been spent doing something else.
- Support from Friends & Family Somewhat Helpful
- I don't know what it is, but I always feel bad talking to people about my problems or stresses, especially in the face of some of the things others are dealing with.
Open Lesbian Relationship Challenges
I realize that relationships are hard enough, but having this one be my first and not exactly "traditional" by societal standards [blah for having said that] relationship makes it even more confusing. Why not ask for help?
Open Depression - Teen
Because depression sucks, and some days I have to ask...is it actually fact or is it all in my head [ie just another excuse]?
Treatments
- Meditation Considering
- I guess I never really learned how to meditate correctly, so I think it could have the potential to work if I learned properly or trusted myself enough to do so.
- Music Considering
- Clears my head, but it's a work-in-progress, considering the wrong track can send me spinning back.
- Pets Working / Worked
- Someone who will love you unconditionally and not talk back or tell you you're insane for feeling the way you do...getting reconnected to the good of the world, for a little while at least.
- Positive Thinking Not Working
- Psychotherapy Considering
- Talking Somewhat Helpful
- Writing Considering
Open Healthy Relationships
I don't know what healthy relationships are really...I just know some of what they aren't? So this shall be a learning experience, I guess...
Treatments
- Patience Somewhat Helpful
- Sometimes works, sometimes doesn't...especially depending on my mood.
Open Sexual Abuse
I...am still fighting with this, I suppose. I don't remember what happened, detail-wise. And sometimes, I doubt that it did...I guess that a part of this is that I think it's my fault, despite all the people in my life telling me it's not and that I was 10, so how could it be?
Treatments
- Talking Too Soon to Tell
- Felt like screaming and running out of the room the entire time...I shook really really badly and cried a lot, but my friends were extremely supportive, despite the fact that I knew that they were horrified. I felt sort of relieved though when I had said everything, but I still...don't really know how to feel [or that I should at all].
Open Teen Sexuality
Sexuality is super-confusing and having someone to talk to and having a consistent place to go to for information makes it a little less stressful.
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