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Nfox25 
I'm 24 years old, i have a 4 and a half year old son. I am not married. I have OCD, Hypermobile syndrome, developmental hip displasyia, some sort of muscle disease, possibly charcot-marie-tooth disease, swyer james syndrome... the list goes on, i could list them all, i can't spell alot of them properly. I have more health problems that my 87 year old grandmother. Living life day to day is very difficult. Its all my energy to get up in the morning. I am going to college, trying to get my bachlelors degree. The doctors have no idea what is causing all of my problems. I have stumped 10 doctors now. Physical therapy has made it worse. The pain is so bad. But somehow, i manage to deal with it and be normal. I don't want my son to see me cry or know how much pain i am really in. It seems no one understand what is it like to be in this pain day in and day out. I feel so alone. Everyone tells i look normal, they don't see anything wrong with me.
Raising a child alone without any real support, trying to be super mom, while going to school, being in immense amount of how no matter how much pain medicine they give you. I would give anything to get some answers and have closure to all of this. Living a life of pain is not a life at all. I just wish there was something i can do or say to make people understand where i am coming from or what is happening to me.
I will end up in a wheelchair, having multiple surgeries, and living a life of pain. Does anyone really understand? Do doctors really understand the word pain, or do i have unusually high tolerance for certain kinds of pain that allows to me get around everyday.
I just feel so alone. My boyfriend has no idea what i am going through. He wants to marry, but should he marry someone who may not be able to have more kids, or will end up in a wheelchair? Is it fair to put someone through that? Or once i get my degree will be able to hold an actual job b/c the pain is so bad i can't sit, stand, or even lay down without wanting to cry? I wish i knew the answer.
Oh well, God give me strength to make through another day of hell.
