ButterflyCNAStudent's Journal

I am sooo lost and lonely and confused and scared. I dont know what to do anymore. My parents are being assholes. I have no money. I dont even have the money to make it to and from work and school until payday.  I had to work a grand total of 11 hours just to bring my bank account back into the positive. Somehow a hundred dollars was withdrawn and I didnt know it so it wasnt written down and I overdrew my account.  I dont get paid until the first and I need about another 60 dollars just to make it until then I have about twenty but i still need that sixty just to make it til payday and that is only if i dont go anywhere other than school and work.  My parents are being complete assholes and wont help me out one bit, even though i have promised to pay them back when i get paid on the first.  I am not going to have the money to make my car payment.  I have nothing to pawn for money cause my last roommate, before i moved in with my parents, pawned all of my stuff.  I feel like there is no point anymore. I am so scared of my family meeting tomarrow. I dont know what my parents are going to do, how they will react. I dont know if i am even going to have a place to live after my meeting tomarrow.  I just dont know what to do anymore. I am not sure that there is even a reason for me to keep living.  I just dont want to suffer anymore. I want to be happy.  I want to feel loved by my family. I want to have friends. It just seems as though i was doing so well and then i somehow spent all this money that i shouldnt have and ended up falling on my face yet agian.  It seems as though everytime I get on the right track i end up falling flat on my face. it is infuriating