funkymonky's Journal

Is it so wrong? Am I really that bad? I could do this on my own. I know staying here isn't the best choice, but it's the easiest one. He doesn't physically abuse me, and he really isn't that bad of a guy. My theapist has suggested that I stop my treatment unless we start marriage therapy, alas, my husband is not at the point yet.  My therapist feels if I continue treatment, I will outgrow our relationship, and I agree, I already have.  I stay at this point because quite honestly, I'm unemployed, and am finishing my degree.  I cannot answer if I was employed, would I still be here, would I be willing to wait for him to find himself.  We are already on such different paths in life, and do not know even once we start marriage theraphy if our paths are going to cross.  I'm not saying I'm going to leave him once I'm done with school, but how long do I give him to "find" himself so he can trust people.  My son and I have already given 6 very trying years.  He has finally come to the point that he knows he has a problem, now that I'm in a deep depression and feel like I'm in a hopeless situation, I know I'm not, but I'm not sure what choice to make.  If I stay, I'm hindering my life, if I go, I'm hindering both of our lives, I just don't know what to do.  I just don't want to make the wrong choice, because either choice is going to have an outcome that might not be wanted.