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Kelz76 
9:02am, July 2, 2009
*%(#.. went to the bar again last night... I did not drink AS much as I normally do.. and all things considered it was a good night.. but I need to stop GOING to the bars.. I cannot believe this is my life.. this wasted corrupt shell of an existance is all I have..
I keep trying to figure out what to do next.. how to find some purpose.. or reason.. I really think I am capable of bieng happy.. of living a normal life.. why does it seem so easy for the people around me to just live.. be normal.. have family's, friends, hobbies.. and more importantly a purpose.. when I cannot seem to achieve any of that.. I feel like everyone I know is a stranger.. I am fairly certain that I dont have a single friend.. just people I work with.. people I know... I want to find someone I can trust.. someone I can let into my life.. but really.. who in their right mind would want to even visit my reality... hell I dont even want to be here...
anyhow.. thanks for listening.. (hahaha.. ok.. I suspect that nobody will ever read this.. with the exception of myself.. but you never know.)
Kelz
