auders's Journal

Well did I get a fright last night,We were sitting having a glass of wine hoping that Laura`s problem`s were over as a whole new shunt system had been put in place from top to bottom,and she was looking well after surgery and the next day until around eight in the evening.The phone went and it was her dad`s partner to say that while her dad was visiting(we are divorced)she took what appeared to be a fit and was in a lot of pain and was asking for me.I got a taxi straight up and found her crying,although the pain had eased off a lot she was still in pain.They took her for a cat scan and said it looked better than before surgery which suggested her shunt is working for now.So why the pain then?why the sickness?it was not a fit they said as a neuro nurse was present and said it was thrashing around with pain,but she could not respond to anyone and ,could hear what they were saying sounds like a fit to me.She said she could not stop her arms n legs from thrashing around,that aslo sounds like a fit.I am losing all confidence in her neuro ,and the hospital it has went downhill in the twenty years Laura has been attending.Hospital care in this country might be free but the standard is by no means good,I have twenty three years experience of it,both for Laura and myself.I would go private health care,but in this country you would still see the same doctors and nurses,the only difference would be a private room with a telephone and t.v,better food and they would treat you with more respect because they can see the colour of your money.People say the American health system is unfair,but in Britain it is just as bad,I would prefer to work and pay insurance to recieve the standard of health care they seem to have in America compared to over here.

She is feeling a lot better today,the pain is still there,but they had to cut into muscle in her neck to reach the y connector that was fractured that goes in to the dandy walker cyst at her brain stem,so I am hoiping that it is just post op pain.The sickness is worrying me though,they moved her tummy shunt position back near to a position where sixteen years ago it stopped absorbing the csf fluid as the peritoneam had hardened,and feel like this might happen again,they say they wanted to put it in a completely fresh part of her tummy,so I have to accept that,but my gut is teling me that eventualy it will have to be replaced by a va shunt.I hope I am wrong.

Well I have now got everything off of my chest,hope my Laura just keeps getting better and better as this has been the worst month of my life up till now,but I will not get my hopes up too high as it has been two step`s forward and ten step`s back for a month why should it be any different this time.My prayers are very long and very often and very repetitive.