Journal

well its your birthday tommorow and we all miss and love you so much the boys are at the sea with auntie christine their having a great time they are going to let pink baloons go for you tommorrow and we have bought you pink flowers donna and ash have bought some flowers for you their lovely we all send our love darling hugs and kisses mum and dad

i am hurting so much i just feel like giving up me and my family are trying so hard to move on but we are struggling my son as become withdrawn that worrys me the boys are asking for mummy more than ever my husband is in a state and i am trying to hold things together we have to be positive but its hard

today as been bad i woke up crying and could not do my work i feel so empty and nothing seems worth wile at the minute it hurts so much i miss amanda more than ever i just want to understand