ddmaries's Journal

I really miss you all here, but I have been sooo freakin busy that I just can't do it all and getting online here takes me a while since for some reason my computer is sooooo slow on this site.  For me to get through everything I want it takes at least 3 hours.  Anyway, I 've been working on "healing the inner child in my" by Alanon and it's been very interesting and I really really like it.  It's hard emotionally but it alllll makes sense to me.  Have you ever read a book that you swear was written for you? 

My Mom fell at work and needed surgery so I've been taking care of her on my one day off.  She's doing well though and, to be honest, as much as I complain because that's my only day off, we really have connected and spent some great quality time together so I am grateful for my time with her.

E. is doing well.  School is going great.  His English teacher approached him and asked him to sign up as his first student in an honors english class the professor is starting at his college.  E. came home and was just soooo happy and proud.  I cried (by myself though).  God it was such an overwhelmingly serene moment to hear how happy and proud he was of himself.  He truly has no clue how smart he can be, but I think he's starting to see it and it's doing wonders for his self-esteme.  He's still in AA (a lot) and seeing a counsellor and working.  All good stuff here...I have nothing to complain about. 

My fears of him relapsing seem to dissipate more and more lately.  There's that part of me that wants to hold onto them because the sickness in my makes me believe that I can actually control it someway...but Alanon is really helping me accept that I can't and in accepting that it's getting easier to let that worry go.