TristanKrauter's Journal

I'm going to the LGBT Pride fest in Denver all alone...Kind of... all behind my moms back. And Mom will be in Denver too at a PIC convention.

I'm riding up there w/ my sister and her GF, but when we get there, we're splitting up! I have to be all alone while Im there. I know I'll be with people like me, but that what makes me more nervous! I wont have anyone I know hanging out with me, Ill be alone, in a corner somewhere, munching on something like the fatty I am, lol.

Im just really Nervous. It's never fun being alone, not even at the anime cons i go to. (though we always manage to make friends and ditch the rest of the group)

I wont be the only Bisexual that I know thats going, but I want to go hang out with some transgendered people, because its not my Bisexuality that I'm having trouble dealing with, it's the fact that I'm transgendered, and I want to go and learn how other trans, maybe around my age, deal with it. :-S Im really nervous, because i dont know if Ill be accepted, I dont know if Ill be brave enough to approach them. Maybe its just 'cause of the way my mom treats me that Im nervous.

My best friend, Soul, was going to go with me, and I really appreciate him for even wanting to go with me, 'cause hes straight, not bi trans or gay, and he wouldve gone with me so I wasnt alone. But his dad said no. Idk y. I'm not mad about it, I just have no one to go with now, lol.

I havent told my mom anything, 'cause she found the transgender symbol on my folder and she flipped out. When I say shes crazy, I literally mean that she was diagnosed crazy. I've become a little more open with it, and more of my friends know now, and everyone supports me, except for her. Ive been drawing the symbol on everything (mostly cause Im bored) but what Im trying to do is give her signs that Im an FTM, which isnt all that subtle, but she remains completley oblivious...kinda. I hate living with her 'cause she purposly fights with me.