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anthb 
This evening i saw my family and it was great.my wife is scared to get back with me right now because of my false promises.we are going to take it one day at a time for now.i really miss her yet she feels i am playing the waiting game with her maybe i should not see her for a few days.I am going to a meeting on friday ,lets see what happens.peace
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today is the 3rd day i have been sleeping at a hotel away from my family for the first time in 10 yrs and it really sucks yet it is something that needed to happen for me to put things into perspective.My wife is the greatest woman and i have not been fair to her with my drinking combined with my inconsiderate times i have been coming home.I should of listened to her as she has been warning me about my drinking and how it was chipping away at her feelings and trust for me.Today i feel sad yet i need to stay strong and direct my energy into fixing this flaw in my character.
I hope you and your family can work through it all. I know how much relationships and employment, etc. is ruined by alcohol. Good luck with your journey.
pennylane5
thank you i appreciate it.i am now back at the house 5 minutes into walking into the door i had a quarrel with my wife.i feel like i am actually still at the hotel.Weird thing is i am happy to be here yet i feel like i am alone since i sleep with my 6yr old (which is nice) but i would like to sleep in bed with my wife and that is not happening and she is pretty cold to me.i do not know how this is going to turn out.
anthb
i am at home but i feel down and i am sure that is because my wife and i are not as strong relationship wise as before.Last night she went out and came home hammered which was all cool with me but then she started to argue with me about the time she came home.Then she brought up my past of coming home late so she is still obviosly hurt.i am trying to deal with it the best possible way i can but i am not sure on how to do that.
anthb
I am happy to report that i am now back home.I was out of the house for two weeks.I did not drink for a month.i no longer have the cravings of drinking "knock on wood".The real test will come when i go out with what few friends i have.I wish i could say things are great at home yet i must atke it one day at a time.Thank you for your advice.
anthb