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sadmom09 
Today is the four month mark, you are four months in heaven today, I could just imagine you sitting up and babbling to your brothers; picking you up from the sitter and breast feeding you; walking around the marina with you in your little stroller; holding you tight while we dance together; changing diapers and cleaning up after you spit up. These are sweet wishes and dreams I have of you.
The hurt is still there but I now can talk about you without choking up, I look upon other little ones and just wonder what you would be like, curly hair, big eyes, any teeth, chubby legs.
We visited yesterday, and your brothers made a race track with monster trucks for you, I thought that this is our normal; Your brothers playing next to you in a cemetary, I am sure other parents who have never experienced death would think we were odd for just playing and speaking with you. The wind blew so softy while I spoke with you and birds circled us, probably to listen in on our conversation. My tears weren't so heavy this time around, but the tears fell lighter. I enjoy our little time we have together, just wish it were real time for us. I love you, and please watch over us.
Mom
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What a nice letter to your little man. How sweet of your boys to make a monster truck track for him. That makes me tear up.I hate our living children knowing this pain.I wish I could give you the moments you long for with him. Even though this is my pain too, I hate knowing that other moms know it. You are in my prayers. Hugs,Cynthia
crwtom