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cookiem 
12:34pm, September 15, 2009
While I try to remain positive, I feel like I am under house arrest and I didn't commit a crime. I am a prisioner in my own body and home. After surviving a bone marrow transplant, I am left with many complications that have made me very dependant on other people. I have lost my freedom. I need to have something fun, something to look forward to. Like a vacation. I am here at home alone. My daughters went to visit my family in San Francisco, my other half is visiting family in L.A. and my best friend is going to her family reunion in Chicago. I want to go! I use to be so active. Not any more. I am living in the body of an elderly woman and my physical condition probably will not change. I have become financially and physically dependant on family and friends. I am grateful that I have the means and wondeful people to support me. I wouldn't be here without them. BUT, No one in my family seems to see the therapeutic value of me getting out of this house. They want to keep me here (in a box) so nothing will happen to me. They do not see the value of a vacation. I can handle most any situation with some adjustments. I can't be in the sun (at all), I have 7 fractured vertabrae, a collapsed torso which makes it uncomfortable to eat, I am anemic, severe osteoperosis, blah...blah...blah...but I am walking with a spine brace and I am a positve and happy person by nature. I just need to go somewhere, make new memories. My mental state has everything to do with recovery. All work and no play makes for a very sad person. I have done everything in my power to explain this to my mother who holds all the $$ cards and she doesn't get it. The funny thing is I am an accomplished 52 year old woman w/ a lot more living to do! Phew!
Comments
I am so sorry you feel so trapped. I dread that happening. Are there any clubs you could join,or organised trips, here we have Age Concern and they will come and pick people up from home and take them out or go on trips. My Mum gets picked up and taken once a week to a craft club (or something like that).
I dont know what else to suggest I am sure you will have explored all those avenues.There must be a way you can get out somehow though!Wont your husband take you anywhere?
Hope you can get something sorted out, it would do you the world of good.
bonnytiz
Thanks for the advice and thoughts. I can go anywhere - my family chooses to keep me home, safe and sound. Unfortunately, I am no longer making my own living and I can't go anywhere unless someone pays. There is money, places to go, time to do it... that is not the problem. Everyone just thinks that something bad will happen and I survived so why take any chances. But, that is no way to live. So, everyone is out of town and I am about to go to a movie w/ a girlfriend they don't know that well. No one has to know but us. I will be more than fine. I am going to see 'Hangover'. I heard it was very funny. Keep in touch.
cookiem
Glad you are getting out,I havnt heard of that movie, one of my friends has just been to see a Sandra Bullock one, The proposal, I have never heard of it, but I love her movies.
I suppose you have tried to talk to the family and let them know how you feel, its your life and you should be able to get some enjoyment out of it, whats the point of staying in all the time. Put your foot down!!!
bonnytiz