Journal

so, there's this guy i like...ill call him bob.

basically every guy in the world scares me. i always think they're going to hurt me or think bad things about me.

but bob is so sweet...and i dont mean like "oh h'e so sweet, he'll never hurt me" and then wham he will.

no, this guy is legit so innocent and teddybearcute. we're rising sophmores, he goes to an all boy school, and i to an all girl school. and i seriously am not scared around him. i get butterflies in my stomach when i see him and i feel like its a cute little crush...but i feel like we would be great together. and ive liked him for about half a year now i guess? i asked him to my school's winter formal and he said yes and came, but we went just as friends. all of our friends know i like him, and some of them say he likes me back but i dont know. he's quiet and realllyyy shy so its hard to know.

anyways, so last weds, i asked him to be engaged to be on facebook. my friend stole my computer and did it for me, because i was too freaked out. i didnt know what it meant. was i asking him out? or was this just an engagement thing?

but, a week later, he still hadnt answered. he gets on facebook via phone and relationship requests dont show up there i think, so my friend imed him and told him to check his relationship requests. he was like "oh, i see" and then he accepted. and then he said "i dont get it..." i mean, he doesnt get on facebook a lot so he might not get that friends get engaged to each other all the time. but IM STILL HAPPY :D especially since on my friend's home page it said

Bob Bobbert is engaged to WritingForTheLove (except with our real names) and then facebook put a pic of us from winter formal next to it.

he might not get it...and his friends are going to go insane because they'll think it means we're dating, which we're not (BUT I WISH WE WERE!)...but im still happy hehehe :)

everytime i see a blue eyed man i freeze. blue eyes are fine. its those BRIGHT blue eyes, the ones that shine so much. i used to love this type of eyes, and i thought that guys with them were the most beautiful guys of all.

and then i started to associate creepers, and the bad, scary men in life with these blue eyes.

and since that moment i made that connection, those bright blue eyes scare me to death.

im at a giant sleep away camp for writers and i walk in on the first day to register. sitting at the table is this guy that i would have thought was gorgeous

had it not been for his extremely bright blue eyes.

they shone so brightly that first day. my friend, who i had warned about my new fear of blue eyes, could tell i was freaking out. i refused to do any activities with this man and i have avoided him since day one. his eyes dont seem to shine so brightly that much anymore, but he still scares me. yesterday morning my friend and i ran into him and he grumbled words at us about where to go. he looked hungover, and my friend commented later that he looked like a guy from the goonies.

everytime i see him i think of what might have happened to me. i cant stop thinking about it.