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Alison868 
7:55am Wednesday
This day has been another blah feeling kind of day. I seem to mostly feel this way when I'm really tired. However, today, Anna and I have a birthday party to go to this evening and it makes me even more aware that my husband will not be with us to enjoy it. He was with us last year at the party for the same person. There will be people there I have not seen this tragedy occurred so I'm sure they will want to offer their condolences. I really just don't want to go but I am forcing myself to go and live life...not hide away from it. It's quite an uncomfortable feeling. I try to make myself smile (as they say, fake it til you make it) when I am very aware of how hard I am frowning. It's not very easy to do. I hate feeling like I don't belong anywhere anymore. Where we live now is a place I never wanted to move to but my husband took a job here. I have visited other places where I have lived and I still feel that same feeling...just lost. I guess that will change in time.
Comments
I know this feeling only to well. I'm very proud of you for forcing yourself to go. It's very hard, especially in the very beginning. I still wonder where I belong, but it does get easier. Give yourself time.
sky123456
Oh, Alison. That is exactly how I feel. Lost. I feel like an outsider looking into other people's lives...since I feel like I've lost my own. Hang in there...I think of you often....
Jeannie
jeannieiam