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Piers 
7:42pm, October 17, 2009
I am having my thoughts again, for some reason my mind is convinced that my mum is taking the toilet brush and rubbing on things I use, i hate these thoughts and she also finds it really offensive.
Anyone have any ideas?
Comments
I went out, came back and washed my hands then ate a chocolate bar. I touched the chocolate. I then looked at my bottle of soap and realised that there was a fly in there, a big one. Im not freaking out. :( :( :(
My mind is cracking but my amazing girlfriend of 1 year has stood by me, supported me and loved me no matter what. She is really quite an amazing woman. I cant describe how much I love her, how much she means to me and where I would be without out. My mind might not have a direction, but my heart does.
My OCD gets worse everyday, I cant even have a smoke without having to wash my hands 3-5 times. I dont understand why and it really makes me frustrated. I have aksed for help, fuck that I have begged for help from the mental health services and they have just let me down totally. I was really suicidal last night, actually standing there ready to cut my wrists and all they told me to do was to 'get a taxi to the hospital'. Great advice, really helpful.
The UK needs a change of attitude. We are not in Victorian times anymore. I am not crazy and I am not stupid. I am a human being and deserve the same resepct as everyone else. I do not need to be talked down to or treated like a child.
I have written emails and called everyone I can think of asking for help, even the Prime Minister and the leader of the opposition. Any replies? Of course not.
Considering 90% of suicide victims suffer from mental health problems you would think the services would want to do more to help, obviously not.
Comments
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Piers,sweety Im really sorry the system over there is so terrible. I wish that somehow you could come here to America, atleast the hotlines here will stay on the phone with you for as long as you want. :( I wish there was something I could do for you.
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i love you so much too angel, you mean the world to me i hate that you're suffering, you will get better though i have so much faith.
It does shock me how little the mental health services are doing :( there should be at least hotlines you can call. I know how frustrating it is :( I know it's not the same as a profesional but you can talk to me whenever you need me :) i'm always here for you
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i am sorry the system is so bad there. i dont know how things work over there but do they acknowledge petitions? if you maybe had a lot of people sign one with documented facts and statistics that they cant deny then maybe they would have to open their eyes and take notice. Just a thought. i hope thing get better.
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i guess you just need to think about it rationally, like how would she have time to do it when i know you're always on gaurd about things like that. Also i just though, your room would smell bad, if she did that.
belladonnagirl
I get bad thoughts like those, I moved out of the family home at 15 because i thought my mom was poisening my food. She was so upset when she found out, I felt so guilty whe i got better. I guess the only thing you can do is try to remember its very unlikely. Try to rationalise.
JeanyMay
When you are thinking these thoughts try to focus on something else or do something to get your mind away from those thoughts maybe watch a favorite TV show or leave the room and distract yourself.
LKM1982
im sorry to hear you are having these intrusive thoughts. i guess what i do when these kind of thoughts come on, is take a few deep breathes and tell myself that these thoughts arent real, they are just part of the OCD. my psychologist tells me that we cant stop these thoughts from coming, but we can tell ourselves its just the OCD and try to focus on something positive. keep telling yourself your mum would never do that, its just the horrible OCD putting distressing thoughts into my mind. also try asking yourself if there is any physical evidence, if it had been rubbed on things you use, you would have smelt it and you would see marks. try and keep telling yourself, the toilet brush has not been rubbed on my things, my mum would never do that, its just the OCD, i am ok. OCD thoughts can seem really real, but we have to just keep telling ourselves that things are going to be ok, and our bad thoughts are just the OCD giving us a hard time. you cant stop these thoughts from coming as i said before, but its just the OCD and you really have to try and focus and take part in the things you love. i hope some of this helps, take care, Dinah
dinah88