shelbyton's Journal

I went to the casino again, I cannot seem to get past the first step "I am powerless against gambling". I don't what happens that gets me to that point. I know driving to the casino I was trying to be concious of what I was thinking and feeling, I was in a haze, felt disconnected from the world, Isolated and lonely. I have not been taking care of myself, I have not been working on this. I cannot seem to be OK with being alone with myself, I need distraction. How do I move forward again with so many set backs? I have given my access away AGAIN, this time I have to stick with it, not trust myself I am not trustworthy against this addiction. I AM POWERLESS OVER IT. Today I will start over, today I will not gamble. I CAN DO THIS.