squeegrrrl's Journal

I constantly have abdominal pains, cramps, and constipation. When I'm lucky I'll have a regular bowel movement for a day or two, but I go right back into constipation. At least once a week it seems I'll have diarrhea all day and feel relieved for a day or so. This all started at least a year ago when my stress got high from graduating high school, starting college, moving out, etc. I got so scared to even go out because I was afraid today would be the diarrhea day, so I limited contact with people. My now boyfriend and I would go out and I would get sick, but he understood. He accepted me for this and we now live together and he helps me with everything, takes me to the doctor, etc. The first doctor I saw for the issue say "you're constipated, take this" and gave me senekot s. I had tried laxatives, I hate prescription meds, especially after dealing with drug abuse many of my teen years. So I tried senekot one or two times and gave up and forgot about it and just hid away from people. I tried diet change, exercise, and more. I saw a doctor again for the issue later, and again, and again. I saw 4 different doctors, who all said different things. One said Inflamed Bowel, one said Crohn's disease, another said stress. They all agreed that it was probably IBS. Finally I bypassed the doctors and got a specialist to help me. They said it's not my gallbladder (my mom, dad, grandparents on both sides, and extended family all have gallbladder problems, but the doc said that's not genetic.. yeah right). I got some blood work done to test for a stomach ulcer, kidney infections, etc etc. I have a colonoscopy scheduled for next week. Hopefully I will finally get a conclusion and some help for this. Lately I have had heart burn and a feeling of a lump in my throat. When I was 7 I was hospitalized because I refused to eat. I thought the lump I felt would cause me to choke. Somehow I got over it, so when it happend a few more times in my life I passed it off as stress or diet. In 2007 I weight 160lbs, the beginning of this year I weight 140lbs. Now I'm 130lbs. because of the lump and my bowels. I ache so bad sometimes I think there may be something else wrong, but I dismiss it and usually take some hydrocodone even though that makes me more constipated. I'd like to have an x ray or ct scan, or anything else that will look for other things wrong because I'm so paranoid now. I've been extra stressed lately because of roommate problems, my hate for my job, college grades not being the best, and other crap. Does anyone else know how I feel?