Journal

my husband was diagnosed with esophageal cancer one year ago----he had chemo and radiation treatments for approximately 12 weeks. He had no side effects from treatments and actually got along very well. The follow up Pet scans and CT scans were better than exoected and they said he was "stable". About 3 months ago, he started complaining about a pain in his stomach and he lost his apetite and all of his energy, He started taking pain meds at this point. He really felt awful and just when he started to feel somewhat better his cat scan showed some hot spots. He had a two day chemo treatment last week and he has been sicker than a dog ever since. It was really horrible. The chemo is once every three weeks for an undetermined length of time. Chemo was suppose to be a one day deal, but he reacted with spiking blood pressure and loss of oxygen and they had to slow it down. We spent two 10 hour days in chemo. It was a nightmare. My husband is not accepting that this cancer is not curable. I do not know what his prognosis is, because he would freak if I asked. He had told everyone that his cancer was gone. I never had the heart to correct him. He doesn't seem to want to know. He even bought a new truck during the time he thought he was "cured". He only has been able to drive it a couple of times before his chemo started last week. He has lost about 50 pounds and looks and feels pretty rough. WE make it through with prayers and God's help. One day at a time is my motto.I try to stay upbeat and positive, but it is hard. I pray for you and your father and family. I know how difficult this is.

Well, I should have read your journal before I replied to your hug comment to me. I would have seen that your Dad is probably not able to eat by swallowing? I'm so sorry to hear that he has multiple things to deal with. Thank God he has you and your mother there to help him.

Did I tell you there is an organization called Cancer Hope Network that will try to connect one or two people with near the same type cancer and stage that you Dad has? I think either a caretaker or person dealing with cancer can call them and they'll match you up. Sometimes, it helps to talk with someone who went through the similar situation and has survived. They are survivors of at least one year.

The two women who called me were stage 3 and stage 4 esophageal cancer survivors. One had it 8 years ago and the other 12 years ago. One was 79 and the other 71. It really helped me to hear their stories.

If you or your Dad aren't ready for that right now, you can print out the info and call when/if you are. It's a free organization and they don't bug you about anything. Here's a link to them. If it doesn't take you there by clicking on it, you can copy and paste it.

http://www.cancerhopenetwork.org/

I had the feeding tube too at one point. Mine was in my small intestines. I imagine your Dad's is in his stomach. It's so great that you can and will handle that for him.

Hang in there. You're still in my prayers. Taking it a day at a time sounds like a great way to deal with things. That's what I always tried to do and still do. God bless you and your family. Brenda

Hi Donna: My prayers are with you and your Dad. Hospitals are hard to be in and hard for family to try to be there and still be at home with their children, etc. BUT, when we need them, it's good to know they are there. It's the best place to be when you need medical care.

There didn't seem to be a mad rush, to them, for me either to see the oncologist when I was diagnosed. It made me think it must not make a critical difference between the wait (a few days/week(s) or a month) and the start of treatment.

But, let's face it we are all usually very anxious for test results, Dr. appointments, treatment and yet there's nearly always a wait... Since, I didn't know much about medicine, I just went with what they told me and prayed that I accept God's journey for me. Ask questions (I'd usually jot mine down) and assess your confidence in his Drs.

God bless. Brenda