ResilientWoman's Journal

October 31, 2009.

Maybe only a little water retention but I'm up to 306.0 (from 305.2) for the end of the month.  I lost at least 8.75 pounds in the month of October (if I allow for water retention, realistically that's more like 10 or more) and finally started to see inches vanish from my arms, neck, waist and hips.

I'm learning a lot about how people succeed and taking their wins to heart in how I conduct my own life.  I'm also learning how I sabotage myself, on occasion.  Cooking at home works, eating out doesn't.  Still breastfeeding.  Have finally figured out the daily goal of 1600-1800 calories works best for daughter and I, breastfeeding and weight loss.  That's like eating 1200-1400 if we'd weaned.  I don't believe in counting calories alone as a health habit.  Tracking serves to keep me honest about whether or not I'm getting enough nutrition to care for my daughter's and my health needs.  Tracking intake also helps me see what foods don't work as well and which habits of mine lead to winning my battle with morbid obesity and lung disease.  I'm learning strategies from being scrupulously honest

Having a tougher time making an hour free just to be active each day.  Having learned that moving from couch potato/invalid to girevik/super athlete *requires* 30 minutes of walking at least 5 days per week, but not *why*...I have failed at my intention to walk daily during October.

Re-energized by the weight loss and feeling much better, I ran into the "why" on www.RealAge.com  the other day.  There are fibers in our muscles that are missing/inactive when we become a couch potato.  The walking turns on the mechanism necessary to build muscle, I believe the article said that it takes about a month.  I need to walk 30 minutes daily in November to help my body become able to meet the demands I'm placing on it.  This doesn't have to be forever, eventually I can do what I love most, swing Kettlebells and walk/climb when the mood hits me and not have to make time every day while still getting sufficient cardio/strength training to exceed my potential.

When I meet my own internal obstacles or physical mobility challenges, I look back at all I've gained and forward to the life I want to live with my daughter.  I allow myself to stay disturbed about the lost years, spent in pain and sedentary, isolated, lonely and miserable.  Now I just want to chip away daily at all the obstacles between me and my dreams.  I will climb mountains again, I will become a doctor, I will bring quality medical care to those who have none.  I will build hospitals where there aren't any.  I will win.

My new mini-goal is to weigh-in dressed out to lift with my trainer at under 300 pounds by Nov 24. 2009.  So 297.5 sans clothes, or 299 in 1.5 pounds of clothes.  This will also up my goal completion to 25% of exceeding my potential.

What are you passionate about?  What small change can you make today, right now, to reach beyond your circumstances to grasp your dreams?  What will you be thankful for this Thanksgiving?