Journal

Can't eat, can't sleep.

where are you?

Don't you miss me?

Everything hurts without you next to me.

Promise me

Another day passes,

and you're farther away it seems.

But I can still hear you say,

goodnight, sweet dreams.

Your voice,

puts me to sleep.

In an attempt to sleep I decided to make a stress list to calm my thoughts.

1. Relationship.

2. Unemployment

3. Education

4. Health

5. Family

6. Chores

7. Financial burdens

8. Future

9. and my mind is jumbling and repeating.

Now for solutions:

1. He's far better than you ever have and hasn't given you a reason to doubt him yet.. so just relax and enjoy.

2. You still work sometimes at the daycare and you haven't even tried applying for anything.

3. You're in school and learning, what more do you want? (don't answer that)

4. Yes well, deal with it... there's a lot of people much worse off than you.. and hey.. you don't even know the results.

5. It's family.. they're supposed to annoy you and worry you..

6. Who cares if your room is messy and they yell at you.

7. Debt.. everybody has it.. it's a trend :)... you're cool now

8. Shit happens, it'll work out. You're too young to worry.

9. So you're crazy.. isn't everyone :)

Hopefully this worked. :) Goodnight, sweet dreams.

well atleast now I'm not afraid.. of what could kill me anyday.

wanting and wishing it would come sooner... maybe even yesterday.

everything i strive to leave behind.. follows me until the end of time.

everything i wish was gone.. is stuck inside of me..

i hate the way they're right..

i hate the way I cant say I'm glad I have you today

I hate the way I get the hope.. that you love me for who I am..

even if I am stupid and shattered

and everything sucks

i give up

please end

nothing can ever make this better.. no one can ever love me

I give up, I'm nothing

I wish i could end it,

see the light and run to it.

be alone until i do.

don't try to convince me im good, it's true.

i hate myself and you will too.