Journal

Ok so  a few weeks ago I felt a bit of a cold coming on, everyone (including myself) joked that it was the dreaded man flu. I really did feel ok until Thursday morning, I was burning up and coughing uncontrollably so I went to see the doctor.

**This was the same wonderful doctor who, after telling her that I was going to kill myself, gave me a prescription for citlapram and sent me home after 5 minutes**

So she sounded my chest, told me I had a bit of a chest infection, gave a prescription for amoxocillan and told me it would clear up in a day or two.....

Oh how wrong she was!!!

On thursday night around half 10 I suddenly toook a coughing fit then started coughing up blood and was unable to get a breath. I got my mum to call for an ambulance, the paramedics immediately got me on an oxygen face mask and took my temperature, it was 40.8 (105.4 F) and my oxygen saturation was around 72%. I was rushed to Antrim hospital, the next few days were a blur but I ended up in intensitive care on a ventilator, tube down my throat, needles in my wrists, elbows, foot and neck, another tube up my nose to feed me and yes even a dreaded catheter.

Apparently I was in ICU for a week and tested for swine flu several times, I can't remember much about it and then last thursday I was transferred to a regular 'lung' ward. Turns out I have severe pneumonia but not swine flu, I was pumped with antibiotics for a week straight then once the tubes all came out I was taking tablets every 6 hours and getting blood samples taken every 2. Eventually by Sunday my oxygen saturation was back up to 90%, it's not perfect but at least I can breathe on my own! So on Sunday the oxygen supply was turned off and I was able to get by without any help from the nurses. 

Yesterday the doctor said I would be better off recovering at home so at 4pm I was discharged. My recovery may take up to 6 months and even as I type this I feel short of breath. So the past 11 days have been eventful to say the least, I just plenty of bed rest and general rest for a while but i'll get through it!!!

I later found out that the woman in the bed across from me in ICU died of swine flu the night she was brought in, one of two people who have died this week of it in Northern Ireland. 

This is a good warning for anyone who forgets to take their venlafaxine and seroquel for, or for those who decide to stop it cold turkey against medical advice!!!

Due to my grandas ill health for the past week or so i'd been away from home and completely forgotten to take my meds since monday. I'd felt fine until a few hours ago probably because i've been so distracted and busy, a reallly bad headache started (still have it now), I feel dizzy, sick and disorientated. At first I didn't know what was causing it, maybe the stress of the past week but I got home and saw the tablet boxesin my room then realised what it was, I just took todays dose. 

The weirdest thing though is the feeling in my head, it's like pop rocks (if anyone knows what i'm talking about) 'exploding candy' popping about in my brain, it's not painful and not like the headache, just a disturbing feeling.

I didn't think anti-depressant medication could cause symptoms like this after only 2/3 days without it, i'm writing this now whilei'm feeling it so other people taking these or similar medications don't make this mistake! Now i'm dreading what it's going to be like when I finally stop taking them. It has taken me almost 45 minutes to write this, my hands are shaking and ive had tocheck the spelling a few times. I'm going to lie down for a while now. 

I was awoken by a loud bang then just general loud noise coming from outside my window, went out to investigate and found my tomato greenhouse lying on its side in the middle of the garden, all 3 plants fell over with it. Several tomatoes didn't survive the gales . (i'm not really upset though, there are still around 40-50 tomatoes left )

In other news my granda's condition may be deteriorating faster than we thought, for the past week he has had severe pain in his lower abdomen and right side. At first we thought it was a kidney infection but the sample came back clear, we had to call the doctor out on thursday who suggested it may be constipation caused by the painkillers he has been taking but couldn't be certain. Another possibility is that the cancer has started to spread, we're all praying this isn't the case. He'll have to go to see his oncologist for another review soon, he's on borrowed time as it is, he was given 6 months 11 months ago. I'm not ready to lose the only dad i've ever known.