Journal

Today is Monday, August 16, 2009.

I am 4 weeks out from surgery, tomorrow.

I can't even believe the gammut of emotions I've been through in the last 5 weeks.  First off....I wasn't worried much about surgery, just excited.  A week before my surgery, my dad passed away and was buried 2 days before surgery.  I guess my mind was not on my surgery and that was a blessing.  

My family (1 son in college, 1 son in high school and my sister) were very supportive.  I stayed with my sister for about 1.5 weeks after surgery.  The only trouble I had was with my blood pressure.  I had  a physical app't with my general practioner the first viewing day for my dad.  My BP was high.  Since I have never had a history of high BP, my doc was not worried.  The day of surgery, my BP was still high and stayed that way the 3 days I was in the hospital.  I was sent home with lowpresser ( a pretty high dose).  6 days later, my Bp was very low.  My GP put me one a catapress low dose patch and said that he'd see me in a month....he didn't think I would need it after that.  1.5 weeks later, my BP is 90/60.  I was dizzy with no energy.  And cry.....!  Wow! It was like I had my period for 2 weeks (emotionally)!  I saw my doc and he took me off the patch.  I'm now just waiting it out until all the bp meds are out of my system.

The first 2 weeks, I kept thinking "Why the hell did I do this???"  I am SO glad I did this.  I am looking forward to so many things.  My ex-husband (the Prince of darkness, as my sister calls him) called to see how I was.  *shock*  He hasn't asked me that since he left me a year ago to leave with his beast (his family's name for her!).  *shock, shock*  he called me 2 days in a row!  My sister said he is probably wondering what I look like now and what I'll begin to look like over the next year.  Well, let him wonder. He moved in with a woman who runs 300lbs and is 6' tall!  Nothing wrong with that, but she continually made rude comments about my weight.  I replied, "honey, I WILL lose weight and you will still be a beastly slut".     *slap my hand on that comment*    She had it coming!

So, here I am......lost 32 lbs in 4 weeks, began a walking regimen.  Will start working out at Curves when I have clearance from my surgeon.  I'm off Cympalta and lyrica, ibuprofen.  I am ready to start my life at 46.  There has to be sooooo much more out there than what I've been living!