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Overwhelmed1203 
10:00am Thursday
Thanksgiving is just around the corner. I am hosting dinner this year for my family. I will have 10 family members in town for the holiday weekend. This is the first holiday I've had since my Mom died. I want to do all things right , like she would. She loved having the family for all the holidays. It's somewhat more stressful since it's not just dinner, but everyone here for the entire weekend. Six of the 10 will be staying in our house, but I do look forward to the time with my family.
I must say I am feeling good. I've been seeing a nutritional response specialist and the supplements she is giving me have really helped. I have noticed that I am handling stress better. However, sometimes I wish I would get more help from my other half. Why do men think everything gets done on its own? I'll never figure that out.
I am thankful for all the Lord has given me and my family, but I have such a difficult time praying right now. Does anyone feel that? It is so hard to stay focused. We've had some trouble with my 15 year old son. He is angry all the time and his grades are falling. I'm very worried about him. Every evening I try to pray for him, but my thoughts begin to wonder. I hope the Lord hears me now, that we need help.
I guess I don't have much to say. I wanted to wish everyone a great Thanksgiving. I wish you all health and peace as we approach the Christmas holiday. I am grateful to all of you here for friendship and concern.
Bless you All, Chris
Comments
Hi All
As many of you know I was to receive my scan results yesterday. I received good news from my oncologist. There is no sign of cancer on any of the scans!!! What a boost to my emotions. I've been very down lately and now I have no reason to be. What a great gift from God and I need to thank Him and be faithful to Him everyday. I pray too that my Mom is watching over me, praying for me, helping me.
I do have pain in my hands and feet that will probably never go away, but I think I can live with that rather than active cancer.
So cancer will still be in the back of my head, but I'm hoping it will not control me. I have family, friends and a support system here on DS and I'm hoping you all help get me through, as I hope I can help you all through your struggles.
I thank you for your kind words, prayers and support. God bless all of you, Chris
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YEAAAAHHHH!!!! WOOOOOOO!!!! HOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!
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Great news!
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I am Sooooooooo very glad to hear the good news!!!! Take care of yourself.
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You are truly blessed. I can imagine that it's a load off your shoulders. **hugs**
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Yeah, good news. I hope future scans come back just as clean. It's hard to push the thoughts about cancer to the back of one's mind. I wish I could totally wipe it out of my mind. Everyone probably has a chance of getting some sort of cancer, but until you actually get the diagnosis you don't think about it. Now that we have had that diagnosis, it has changed how we think. Are our risks any higher than before we got the diagnosis? We'll never know for sure. But now that we have had to face the reality, cancer will always be more a part of our thoughts. Thanks for letting me share thoughts on this topic.
It's been a long while since I've written anything. Not sure where to start. I believe I wrote about my blood markers that were taken back in August. They were good and the doctor wanted to see me the end of October. Well by the end of September I was beginning to have dizzy spells. I contacted by doctor after about 10 days. When I saw her she decided to order my scans. My doctor didn't seem alarmed as far as the cancer was concerned, but figured we'll go ahead and get the scans a few weeks early. She did also lower a dose of medication I take for neuropathy.
So on Monday I will get all the results of my scans(PET, mammogram & ultrasound). Hopefully they are good, but it's really difficult not to worry or think about all the "what ifs". I guess that's what I am having difficulty with now. How do you continue to live with cancer hanging over your head? I don't know how to do it. Especially on the days I don't feel well, I think it would be easier not to hurt and not to fight. I feel awful thinking that way. I feel guilty thinking that way because of my kids sake. What would they think about their Mom not wanting to fight and being around for them?
I guess I really don't have any answers. At least not yet. It's still a lot to process for me and I hope I can. Maybe on Monday, if my results are good, it will be a little easier moving on. Let's hope.
Comments
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I am so sorry to hear about all that you have been through. After reading your journal, I prayed for you. I prayed that the results of your test will be positive and that you will have the strengh to do whatever is necessary to bring you back to good health. My heart goes out to you & your family regarding your cat. Our pets are as much a part of the family as our relatives (some even more so). My cat of 13 yrs died last year and the loss to me & my son has been great. I truly miss the comfort that he would provide by just being around me. You & your family will truly be in my thoughts & prayers on Monday.
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I am dealing with sorta the same issue of "Life After the End of Treatments". What now? I'm trying to find my "new normal". Normal routines, normal feelings, but nothing seems normal after having had cancer. Yes, as far as we know the cancer is gone from my body through surgery and radiation. However, the experience of having cancer will never be gone from my life. It is a part of who I am. I think, everyone expects you to get back to normal because the treatments are done, you're cured, right? It's still in my thoughts. It has changed me in ways I can't describe or even fully understand. And we still have that waiting game, waiting for the results of the latest test. And those tests must become a part of your yearly routine (every 3 months, ever 6 months) with scheduling the tests, going for the tests, worrying about the test results, and if the test comes back positive will I have the strength to go through it all again.
I so totally understand your journal. Let's keep talking and helping one another.
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I have a difficult time praying too. When I can't stay focused, I use short prayers. It's only important to stay close to God. Even if you can't pray at the moment, you can be sure that He hears you and He will help.
I'm glad you are feeling good. Wish you a great Thanksgiving. Have a great time with your family.
LaraB
Hi, Chris.
If it's not too late, ask the family to help with the Thanksgiving meal. The one who makes the best dressing can do it, the ones who do the best pies can bring them, the ones who have the best sweetpotato casseroles can make it, etc. That way it will truly be a family meal and you will have time to visit with them instead of being stuck in the kitchen the whole day and night.
Perhaps one of the guests has been where your son is now, in life? Maybe he can have a talk with the boy to see what might be bothering him. Hard time to be a teenager. Might he be worried about having to go to war? He's not that far from draft age, if it is ever re-instated. ( Pray it doesn't happen.)
Oh, most men are that way. First, mom did everything for them. ( It is the rare man who was lucky enough to have a mom who 'house-trained' him--showed him how to do laundry, clean the house, cook. ) Then, if he's lucky, he gets married and the little wifey does everything for him. Oh, don't get me started down that road. :-O
You have a pleasant visit with family this weekend. And watch out for that kitty! Be wanting to 'help' with the cooking. Been there, believe me.
Take care,
Bertha
Belcat